News Article

Feature: The Most Bizarre Nintendo Life Search Results

Posted by James Newton

You won't believe your eyes

We get around 300,000 referrals from search engines every month, but while you won't be surprised by the most popular searches — turns out around 50,000 people find it hard to remember the address nintendolife.com — some of the bottom-ranked searches will certainly raise your eyebrows.

Here — in the spirit of our award-winning series Bizarre Emails Sent to Nintendo Life — we've collated some of the more oddball and outlandish search terms that bring people to our fair corner of the Internet. If you recognise some of your own searches in the list below, probably best to keep quiet about that.

The Big Questions

why is this forum of people less

A stunning 64 hits from this search term that links to a legendary forum thread that defines everything that's brilliant about our message board. You guys must love that topic.

Why is WiiWare so bad?

Not many people asking this question wind up here, probably because we're rather fond of WiiWare on the whole — without it we would never have had MotoHeroz, LostWinds or the BIT.TRIP games. Probably a fair question on balance, though.

The Weird Questions

Not everyone is asking the same thing, though: these are just some of the terms generating a single visitor to Nintendo Life. You'll see why.

It just works that way

hey why you're free games

The eternal question

why are blue shells in mario kart so cheap

Homework assignment

25 words or less why you would like to become a nintendo ambassador

We'll get our crystal balls out

nintendolife what game should i get next?

Actually, one more big question

if corporations are for globalization why are games region locked?

If we only knew...

super smash bros brawl why are the people so weird

Just Plain Odd

We have no idea how these terms got their addled searchers here, but thanks for visiting all the same.

Breaking Down, Part 1

crazy twilight sparkle

You got that right

"i'm sonic" "i go fast"

We want an invite

Dead goat party

BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM

music that sounds like fireworks

It's Avenging Spirit!

a gameboy game - youre a ghost and you enter people's bodies for a short period to survive

It's over

boyfriend hates zelda

They certainly are

image of sexy cartoon girls are without cloth

Surprised this isn't the top result

sony fanboys bashing on nintendo

Surely it'd just be a girl looking surprised? (Incidentally this is by far the cleanest Samus search result we have)

a girl discovering samus was a woman

All bases covered

"video games" or "videogames" or "videogame" or "video game" or "computer game" or "computer games" or nintendo or playstation or xbox or "nintendo 3ds" or wii

No thank you

analise sonic adventure 2 dreamcast

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User Comments (71)

zezhyrule

#3

zezhyrule said:

Haha, I'm pretty sure about half of the 'why is this forum of people less' were from me trying to find the thread :sweat:

JayArr

#9

JayArr said:

I wonder if "crazy twilight sparkle" was about vampires or Bronies. >.>

The last one was classic. xD

AbuJaffer

#11

AbuJaffer said:

"If corporations are for globalization why are games region locked?"

This actually makes sense. But after thinking about it (which I'm not supposed to do about anything on the internet), I think I might have the answer; it's cheaper. Setting up servers in the US, for example, is probably cheaper than it is in Japan or the UK because of much higher minimum wages and whatnot. Then there's the whole, keeping track of each game internationally versus keeping track of each game in every region; the latter is probably a bit more manageable (and ultimately cheaper), which is what Nintendo wants to do; to pay less cash.

RaylaxStaff

#12

Raylax said:

"image of sexy cartoon girls are without cloth"

...

**shuffles off to delete search history**

bboy2970

#15

bboy2970 said:

This is the most epic article I've read in recent memory. I laughed so hard at a few. I hope NL continues to do more things like this and those email articles. :D

LordJumpMad

#17

LordJumpMad said:

You gotta love NL
Its the only place to make fun of their own users
Classy stuff right there :D

pixelman

#20

pixelman said:

James... You gotta be careful about being the guy that goes out and show shows.
hahahahaha, new favorite NL article.

Tasuki

#21

Tasuki said:

Now it makes sense on why we see new users pop up that start new threads and your like WTF????

Zach

#22

Zach said:

I would like to become a Nintendo Ambassador so that I can download some free games. I really like the games that you can download.

HipsterDashie

#24

HipsterDashie said:

Well, anyone who's seen the more recent episode would know that Twilight Sparkle is inclined to a crazy outburst every now and then. >_>

FluttershyGuy

#25

FluttershyGuy said:

I do not claim credit for "crazy Twilight Sparkle". I already know everypony else has made her crazy, so no need for me to run searches like that. :P Still, after seeing this, I'm going to be REALLY CAREFUL what I type into that search box, LOL.

moomoo

#27

moomoo said:

All of us should analise Sonic Adventure 2 Dreamcast.
That is so immensely awesome. No one could ever do that on purpose.

SMEXIZELDAMAN

#30

SMEXIZELDAMAN said:

"image of sexy cartoon girls are without cloth" ahahaha this one my favourite xD im sure it's otaku's as well

JamieOStaff

#31

JamieO said:

In some respects the "analise sonic adventure 2 dreamcast" search has been covered, albeit in reference to the GameCube game, because @Mr_Reece provided comparisons between the Dreamcast and GCN versions in his Sonic Adventure 2: Battle Nlife review.

Birdman

#32

Birdman said:

"music that sounds like fireworks"

... The rest of Strawberry Jam by Animal Collective? sorry, the hipster in me had to

Slapshot

#34

Slapshot said:

So we got references from people looking for Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1! Haha

Stine

#35

Stine said:

I'm pretty sure I've Googled "why is this forum of people less" at least once, just because I wanted to read through the thread again. :p

"hey why you're free games" ...WTF

SunnySnivy

#36

SunnySnivy said:

"sony fanboys bashing on nintendo"
Lol. Why would you search for something like this? I'm surprised this site showed up as a result, it's kind of the opposite here.

Flowerlark

#38

Flowerlark said:

I wonder if 'crazy twilight sparkle' has anything to do with Twilight Princess, 'Cause those crazy bugs sure sparkled...

Gamesake

#42

Gamesake said:

The comparisons between the Dreamcast and GCN versions of Sonic Adventure 2 have not been covered to my satisfaction. I think we need to probe deeper.

Tare

#43

Tare said:

"Incidentally this is by far the cleanest Samus search result we have"

That's just sad -_-;

HanuKwanzMasBif

#44

HanuKwanzMasBif said:

Those are great, except, like other people, it bothered me that you thought Twilight Sparkle was about Twilight.

FluttershyGuy

#46

FluttershyGuy said:

@LiquidVolt
I should've known it was YOU! :P Surprised it wasn't "crazy Pinkie Pie", hee hee. Anyway, everypony knows Fluttershy is always graceful and never goes crazy. ;)

Oh, games, y u no free??? ROTFLMAO

Punny

#47

Punny said:

"image of sexy cartoon girls are without cloth"

YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAKE YOUR TIME

Usagi-san

#48

Usagi-san said:

Wait... How do you have access to what people search for? Sometimes the Internet is a scary place.

Mowzle

#49

Mowzle said:

I've just been off to view the legendary forum thread. I laughed so much I nearly woke the saner half of my partnership who is sleeping in the next room.

skywake

#50

skywake said:

@Usagi-san
It's fairly standard fare and it's purely so you can work out what people are coming to your site looking for. It's so you can work out what topics/posts are generating the most traffic and why.

...... and the why is sometimes really, really strange

kobe1724

#52

kobe1724 said:

The way I found this website was by searching for reviews, and now, it's my main site when it comes to gaming!

AlbertoC

#53

AlbertoC said:

@Usagi-san: Google searches are used by the websites, like those samples here. They are used for a variety of purposes, mainly for statistical data: what the users want, how to generate more interest -> traffic -> revenue. It's not like google searches must become classified info.

Also, i don't think someone is dumb enough to search for (already known, i pressume) sensitive information on google. But well, that is the way it is, that is the way it has been, and nobody has died from it, trust me.

Whatever, i'm not google.

Popyman

#56

Popyman said:

"image of sexy cartoon girls are without cloth"

TokyoRed's topics brought this guy here. =P

rafaelluik

#60

rafaelluik said:

Hahahaha!

@Usagi-san the data comes from referral data (e.g. they know a visitor came from the URL google.com/search?q=nintendo+life so they know the user searched for "nintendo life").

TheAmazingRaccoon

#61

TheAmazingRaccoon said:

when I typed "video games" or "videogames" or "videogame" or "video game" or "computer game" or "computer games" or nintendo or playstation or xbox or "nintendo 3ds" or wii, into google I couldn't find this site (apart from this article of course) on 26 pages of results. It is a wonder that someone linked to nintendo life from that search.

James

#62

James said:

As if I — a self-respecting 27-year old married man — know anything about either Twilight or that cartoon with ponies in it. Honestly...! ;)

Fuzzy

#63

Fuzzy said:

Haha I love these articles. Read through that thread, and it turns out I commented in it. It feels so long ago...

I want to see this dead goat party.

FluttershyGuy

#64

FluttershyGuy said:

@James
"...that cartoon with ponies?" Are you trying to find out why they call her crazy Twilight Sparkle? ;) She IS a powerful magic user, who could probably cast meteor, flare, or ultima. Just trying to look out for ya, buddy. ;)

eviLaTtenDant

#65

eviLaTtenDant said:

"sony fanboys bashing on Nintendo" - LordJumpMad (and / or his crew) must've had quite an impression on this guy

James

#66

James said:

@FluttershyGuy oh I'm sorry, I was under the impression these ponies weren't real. I didn't realise they weren't real and could cast magic!

JamieOStaff

#68

JamieO said:

Goodness me, I was so slow on the uptake the first time I read this. I wrote a comment about "analise sonic adventure 2 dreamcast" taking it on face value as a simple mis-spelling of the word 'analyse'.

It was only after reading @Gamesake's "I think we need to probe deeper" quip, that I recognised the double meaning of that particular search. D'oh!

Either that means I have a clean, simple mind, or alternatively my brain may be in need of a double entendre enema.

FluttershyGuy

#69

FluttershyGuy said:

@James
What do you mean not real? I see and talk to them every day! The meds are supposed to keep me from, but I hide them under my tongue. :P Twilight's going to make me a pair of my very own gossamer wings! ;)

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