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Features: Bizarre Emails Sent to Nintendo Life - Volume 2

Posted by James Newton

Back once more!

Our previous article, Bizarre Emails Sent to Nintendo Life was such a hit that we raided our email archives to find even more oddball requests, ranting users and people mistaking us for the Big N.

The vast majority of these emails were sent before we published our previous article, to weed out any fame-seeking impostors. Read on and enjoy.

Angel Guard

Will I be able to use the Angel Guard for TV streaming on my Wii console.

Angel Guard is a special safety belt release mechanism for children who haven't yet learnt to work a regular seatbelt. Does it allow TV streaming on the Wii console? We doubt it.

rkhalliday

Former user rkhalliday was the afram of his day. As well as passing off Nintendo Life content as his own on his blog, he sent eight emails over the course of five days, mostly asking for the same thing.

can you make a game like cop the recruit but make it in robin hoods days please you can ride horses karts use a bow a nife a sword and you could make your guyopen world ds game please

make a game called call of destiny like assassins creed but open world ds game please

is assassins 2 creed ds going to be open world can you name me some open world ds games like cop the recruit please

how is assassins creed 2 going to be ds if you do know on the graphics or the open world please send me a email

Followed four minutes later by:

how is assassins creed 2 going to be ds if you do know on the graphics or the open world let me know by the way i removed cop the recruit sorry i did not know you made the article

And this the next day:

can you please tell the owners of nintendo to make a open world ggame like cop the recruit but call of justice or call of destiny

You can probably guess how the rkhalliday story ends. Word to the wise, kids: a combination of pestering the site admins and stealing site content does not a happy ending make.

The bizarre remainder

1. Everybody wants something for nothing

Address removed

October, 25th 2010

Dear Nintendo Life:

I am a grade 12 student attending West King High School, in Nova Scotia. I am currently taking a multimedia course and we were wondering if you could send us some cool promotional items to put up around our class and school. I feel this would help your company because there would be many teens looking at your advertisements. As teens we are your main target audience. We are looking for anything you are willing to give us so we have a more technology based looking classroom and learn more about innovative technology.

Hoping to see some promotional items in the mail soon.

2. To the point

Want to do a link exchange?

ThanksDan

3. Probably not, no

Are you planning on arranging to have The Bugs Bunny Crazy Castle come out on Wii to download? This is a great game and my son keeps asking me about it.

4. Introducing our factory

Dear Friends,How are you? Nice to know your great website and the greatest online business. We take the liberty of writing to you that hopefully introduce our factory to you. Our factory is dedicated in manufacturing good and high quality knitting garments on the basis of client’s specific requirements, our main production items are T-shirt, Polo Shirt, Sweat Shirt, Sports Wear.May we ask if you are interested in finding an overseas factory to import and manufacture for your custom order T-shirts, other clothes? Thanks really for your time to browse our website at your convenience. We will apologize for any interruption of this self-promotion letter. YOUR returned E-mail will be highly appreciated, we will reply you soonly.Thank you, best wishes to all of you.Bill

5. Demanding questions

why cant you publish more for our money more fun and creative games we need some more?!?!!?!?? and they should have a dsiware recommendation forum on thewebsite u know so people can express their ideas

6. Extremely capable youngster

where can I buy "dit it my self abc123" I am in address removed Thanks .

7. For you, it's on the house

how much is it for a review about my website and a link to mariogame.info. thanks

8. Not again!

i need wii cricket work in USA if you sale let me know i like to buy. thank you

9. Copyright a Luigi fan, 2010

Dear Nintendo,Have you ever thought to make a Paper Luigi video game? I'm sure MANY Luigi fans who played Paper Mario The Thousand Year Door, would like a Paper Luigi game to play. There aren't many games based on Luigi alone except Mario is Missing and Luigi's Mansion. In Paper Mario The Thousand Year Door Luigi tells the player about his adventure in the Waffle Kingdom. This makes the player curious about what Luigi was doing. Luigi and the Super Luigi books exagurate about the adventure so we (the players) wonder what really happend. Please make Paper Luigi to let in what really happend.Sincerely,A Luigi fan

10. The Wii keeps swearing

Hi My Censor To My Wii Is Not Working At All And I Was Wondering How Do You Fix That Problem ?

11. Another satisfied customer

Warmen Tactics: F*** this game. F*** your review of it. You a*******. Thanks.

12. A fine grasp on technology

I have an older wii. Will this work with an older wii? Can this work going through a wireless router? Also, once I download the game, is it in my wii forever? I have to take my wii with me for the holidays and want to download this first. If i pack it up and take it, i want to make sure the game is in my wii to go with me. Thank you in advance for the help!

13. We'll get right on it!

To whom it may concern,

I have had this DS game 'Driving Theory Training' for a couple of month now and i have just noticed a grammer error. On one of the traffic sign questions, it asks what a sign means (green circle with a white Go inside'

The question: This traffic sign means?

A. Manually operated temporary STOP sign.B. Manually operatedtemporary GO sign.

Can you see the grammer error in answer B? There is no space between 'operated and temporary'. That is what comes onto my screen.

14. We feel good about this, thanks for asking

Dear Nintendo,

May u plez ask video game historian if they could start sending the Mortal Kombat games that were on the SNES and N64 to the virtual console network? If u could, plez let me know the release and/or how u feel about this.

15. Please help!!

I HAVE A QUICK QUESTION ITS ABOUT THE NINTENDO DSI CAN YOU PLAY REGULAR NINTENDO DS GAMES ON THE DSI SYSTEM OR DO YOU HAVE TO HAVE JUST DSI GAMES BECAUSE I AM NEW TO THIS SYSTEM AND I DON'T NO.

16. Look in the box

where can i download the firmware for DSi?

17. Maybe yes, maybe no

Are you considering to release OFF ROAD CHALLENGE N64 for VC? Please advise.

18. Doing your homework

Do you have a company store in London. I would like to visit while I'm in town. I am staying near Russel Square. You may email me or call number removed. Regards

19. Of course we want your comments

Do you really want my comments? I pasted the link onto the Google search box and got "not found". Then I cut off my name at the end thinking that would help - it does on other links. No - I got survey of toys, games, etc. - but nothing about your customer service. I had asked for hints for lefthanded people playing Wii Sports Bowling. The reply was that the webmster or whomever could give no hints to better my score. At least you could give me another link that would help.

20. Smart shopper

can you put old nintendo games on dsi ware like super metroid or super punch out games that really are worth the money

21. Letter for Mario

What do you think of Luigi?

22. First words are tough

Dhowear sir madam i would like to order pokemon ranch [wiiware] how do i do this

23. THANK YOU SO MUCH

I purchased a Wii with the mario wheel from my Choice catalogue for 285 pounds a couple of weeks ago for my grandson birthday, sorry to say that i did not check all the parts were included. As a result it ststes that the SPORTS is included yet the one i received has this missing, also my daughter is un able to find the paperwork that came with the package. Could you please send me the game that is missing, my address is address removed THANKYOU SO MUCH

23a. Oh, and whilst I remember

on my previous message i forgot to ask if you will be bringing the Power Rangers out for the Wii AS MY GRANDSON KEEPS ASKING FOR IT, HE HAS IT FOR THE PLAYSTATION BUT IT DOES NOT SEEM TO BE AVAILABLE FOR THE Wii

23b. Ah yes, and one more thing

Can i order the new DSI direct from Nintendo

24. Seasons and greetings

My friends and I have come up with a great idea for a new game.The game is called "wii seasonal". The four seasons provide the choice of games to be played as follows:- Spring brings a choice of games like Sow the seeds and Hunt the Easter Eggs and games in the the Autumn season like Rake up the leaves or Carve the pumpkin. We obviously could supply the full details of all the games for all the seasons if you are interested.Please contact me initially via my Mums email as above.Thank you name removed aged 9

25. Say what?

can you tell me member of club nintendo can you send messages thankyou from name removed

26. Hollywood dreams

If I have a development budget what would it cost to build a game for the wii platform? I've formed a business with a few friends (one being a fairly big name in hollywood) and we have a video game concept that we feel would be really cool. We have pitched our game idea to Tecmo games and if they pass we might fund the project ourselves - this is why I'm trying to find out what it might cost to create a game for the wii. i've never heard of wii ware until today... is this an option for development game creation?

27. The winner is...

can you tell me who is the winner and send me the link or telll me where is it

28. The prodigal son returns!

rkhalliday: is ghostwire out yet

29. Mortal Kimbat, starring Kim Basinger. Coming 2011.

help midway to make mortal kimbat 1-4, and any rampage video games but esspsually n64 game to virtural console games

30. Great ideas all

dear Nintendo me and my fellow animal crossing ds fans are wondering if you are going to make a animal crossing 2 for the ds because we are getting a bit bored with the old one its been out for so long and i think it will be good to have a new version that's even better than that one i have some ideas what you can do to improve the game to make another animal crossing such as-new hair styles clothes accessorize wall paper floor and furniture-when tom nooks shop gets bigger so does the able sisters-you can design your face and town to suit you-some rare fish and bugs-you can change shoes-better graphicsthese are only a few of the many ideas i have for the new animal crossing i know that it will be a huge hit and everyone will buy one including me and all my friends

Yours sincerely Name removedContact me by email Address removedOr write back with the address Address removed

P.s: if you do use these ideas please can i be on the credits look forward to hearing from you. Age 13

31. Just sayin'

here a list of games that I like to download to my wii virtual console:

Blazing Star (NeoGeo)Viewpoint (NeoGeo)SideArm Hyper Dyn (TurboGrafx16)

32. Very, very dangerous.

Dear Sirs,

I don't think I'd qualify as an authorized Wii developer because I don't have game development experience or a secure office location. But I do have what I think is a good idea for a Wii game. Does Nintendo accept proposals for new games or are the legalities of intellectual property too dangerous?

33. We all agree

I think nintendo shoud bring back all the classics like the nes,snes,64. But smaller.

34. Irony

are they coming out with a game for the WII that is like the kinect game for Xbox and PS3? If so when?

Continue reading: Volume 1 | Volume 3

More Stories

User Comments (92)

LuWiiGi

#6

LuWiiGi said:

#31 is great, and #21 is funny too. I also love how half of the emailers think you're Nintendo.

R-L-A-George

#8

R-L-A-George said:

LOL, you should forward these to Nintendo if you can. I can see the crazy and they don't just do it by email I noticed....Have you seen the help and suggestion part of the forum...Talking about your random question that look like Nintendo's territory.

Belgicario

#9

Belgicario said:

Lawl :D "are they coming out with a game for the WII that is like the kinect game for Xbox and PS3? If so when?"

carson

#11

carson said:

lawl. some of these are funny... why do they send ya'll (nintendo life) emails about game development....ya'll (nintendo life) don't have anything to do with that.

James

#12

James said:

Also, a word to the wise: don't start sending in stupid emails like some users already have. We weren't born yesterday ;)

Golgo

#13

Golgo said:

Big deal. So you get spam too. Thanks al lot for spamming us with your spam, NintendoLife. I've a good mind to send you an email about this...

;)

R-L-A-George

#14

R-L-A-George said:

I wouldn't....but unintentionally stupid tweets, yes....I was still wondering, why I was unfollowed and how can you tell what I was tweeting..unless only 50 to 100 accounts you follow on twitter are active and the rest are dead?

JimLad

#15

JimLad said:

What do you think of Luigi?
:D
How do you respond to these? (if you respond)

Starwolf_UK

#17

Starwolf_UK said:

I liked #13 but only because it reminded me of this little bit of film trivia:
A tagline originally suggested for this film was; "The future is in the hands of a man who has none." This was considered to be a confusing tagline, as it made it sound as though he had no hands, as opposed to having no future.
(from the IMDB entry for Twelve Monkeys)

That aside I wonder what the age of most the people sending these e-mails is. I've sent some fairly daft things when I was younger.

DannyBoyTheDude

#21

DannyBoyTheDude said:

@18 They should have that on a big banner running up the side of the site, or at least on the contact page.

Chris720

#24

Chris720 said:

10. The Wii keeps swearing

Hi My Censor To My Wii Is Not Working At All And I Was Wondering How Do You Fix That Problem ?

11. Another satisfied customer

Warmen Tactics: F*** this game. F*** your review of it. You a*******. Thanks.

In my opinion, these two are HILARIOUS!!

ueI

#25

ueI said:

Does the T-shirt vendor sell clothes made out of horse hairs? I support the idea of Luigi's Waffle Kingdom game!

RogueBologna

#27

RogueBologna said:

I agree with demon, those were my favorite. I thought the last one was funnier. Step up your game, idiots! :p

RaylaxStaff

#29

Raylax said:

"Will I be able to use the Angel Guard for TV streaming on my Wii console"

I have often wondered this.

NintendoWorld1

#30

NintendoWorld1 said:

If Nintendo Life get all those emails thinking they are Nintendo, I wonder how many emails Nintendo actually recieve. I emailed Nintendo once asking if I could buy an AV lead, a sensor bar and an AC adapter! I never got a reply and I was serious....

danschemen

#33

danschemen said:

the site on #7 is AWESOME!!! i love super smash flash 2. the best computer game i have every played! it's like super smash bros. but it has a bunch of extra characters like Sora (from Kingdom Hearts), Megaman (from well you know :)), Naruto (from Naruto Shipuden or how ever you spell it), and even more!

Zach

#35

Zach said:

Thanks for putting these together, James. It can be hard work to go back through the archives and compile something like this, and you've done a great job again. It's really a delight to read.

Also, "But smaller." ftw.

B-ry

#37

B-ry said:

This made my morning. For some reason I lol 'd so hard at #21

Kid_A

#39

Kid_A said:

I love these. It's so mindblowing how many people mistake us for Nintendo. Part of me thinks it's just a cruel joke, but these are way too convincing to be fake.

greenellow

#40

greenellow said:

I have the same question on that last e-mail because the wii would do so much better with motion control

Xkhaoz

#42

Xkhaoz said:

Wern't as good as the first ones, but still good. Man, a lot of these people are just plain stupid.

Iggy

#44

Iggy said:

Thanks for sharing this stuff with us ill read more of this later. I feel bad for you guys having to read this stuff because how do you respond to these emial without telling them there stupid.

Moorpheel

#49

Moorpheel said:

so this why your Move and Kinect sites aren't called "PlaystationLife" and "XboxLife" huh

Incognito_D

#50

Incognito_D said:

I can't believe so many people can't tell the difference between an independent news and review site, and Nintendo itself!

ogo79

#52

ogo79 said:

kane yu plaese sind us sume fre games tu play no?
is projekt for shcool tu learn studi of vido games.
no?
where is axel fore stretts of rage to go?

Kingbuilder

#53

Kingbuilder said:

"Warmen Tactics: F*** this game. F*** your review of it. You a*******. Thanks."

Priceless.

NintendoNaut

#54

NintendoNaut said:

The sad thing is, I can see E3 2011 now. Reggie gets up there--"And NOW. Prepare for a NEW era of gaming. Wii Seasonal will put the power of seasons in YOUR hands. With exciting games like Easter Egg Hunt and Carve The Pumpkin, your Wii console will NEVER be the same."

Objection

#55

Objection said:

Wow, people disappoint me more every day. But thanks for putting this feature up to have a few laughs between the countless face palms.

ps2fan

#60

ps2fan said:

I had actually sent an email with hopes of getting an answer shortly after the last one of these. Timing was mainly due to the fact that prior to it I hadn't known you could email Nintendo life. Sadly I never got an answer.

PSICOffee

#61

PSICOffee said:

Man I've been waiting for the seqauel so mauch th8nks~!

Reading these certainly makes me feel better about my own edumacation and getting by in the world. I'm sure many are just a bunch of pre-teens with computers, which sadly the newest generation is born into having, so they don't care or know the propar wai to spele. But I generally have trouble believing that some of them aren't just a few trolls doing this a year ago or so, or perhaps more likely a bunch of white trash southern idiotic americans who don't even know things like what the UK is at all (of course I'm giving a shout out to CNNNN).

I know saying white trash is mean, but not only is it true, I'm white and born in the south so its a good excuse for me to be able to say it. Its a shame people act this way, and all we can do is pity and laugh at them. Hopefully you guys didn't leave them hanging and sent a reply or forward to N telling the people they have the wrong address. :p

James

#62

James said:

We often reply to point these readers in the direction of Nintendo - don't worry, we don't just leave them hanging :)

@Ant Maybe the next feature can be "Bizarre Phone Calls to the Nintendo Life Office" :D

Twilight_Crow

#65

Twilight_Crow said:

I've always thought that you should have something very very inteligent and important to say to contact a company or site, that's why I never contact any :P. This features are great, these people are clueless. And Paper Luigi is indeed a good idea, but sending it to NL wasn't lol.

mariosonic1

#72

mariosonic1 said:

"Warmen Tactics: F*** this game. F*** your review of it. You a*******. Thanks."

Lol.Was that the full email or there was more to that?

PSICOffee

#76

PSICOffee said:

@Big A2 yeah The Chaser, his name had escaped me at the time. Actually I only know of it from watching a lot of it on youtube. Pretty hilarious stuff. It makes me feel ashamed to be an American, but at least I know there are plenty of people that aren't stupid here, and you find idiots like that everywhere.

clafl77

#77

clafl77 said:

"This makes the player curious about what Luigi was doing." LOL
Luigi was sitting in a dark room somewhere with his head in his hands wondering why his brother Mario gets to headline all the good games.

shinesprite

#78

shinesprite said:

34 was indeed funny.

@James How much of your time do you think emails like these have wasted? Also, great expressions. Please add more pictures of yourself!

Sylverstone

#79

Sylverstone said:

I can enlighten you guys on #11.

Me and a friend (NintenDaan) were talking about how people trolled his own Warmen Tactics review and when I investigated, the user (and a bunch of other subs) were all puppets pimping Warmen Tactics and Space Trek, possibly a company underling used to get people pumped for these games.

James

#80

James said:

@shinesprite Far, far too much! As for more pictures of myself, I don't think the Internet needs any more pictures of me pulling stupid faces. There's plenty out there already, trust me!

shinesprite

#83

shinesprite said:

@James You could run your next feature on that gibberish postcard and other weird mail you've gotten. :)

James goes to buy a bigger mailbox.

Wolfenstein83

#85

Wolfenstein83 said:

I wonder if people send weird e-mails on purpose?
Then they can entertain us in articles like this.

AutumnShantel

#86

AutumnShantel said:

I would like an Offroad Challenge remake for the Virtual Console... How is that funny? NL, if you don't do it for him, do it for me.

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