MajorasLapdog

@Laxeybobby oof SEVEN closures in 3 hours. If a game closes itself once during my whole play through, I’m left with a bitter taste. Seven in such a short time? That’s deep into unacceptable territory

@Dr_Corndog the only thing that concerns me is Rodea the Sky Soldier on Wii/Wii U. Bought that on good faith due to his pedigree and found it super repetitive and poorly designed.

That said, this does look like a fun mix of NiGHTS and Billy Hatcher and I’ll never turn down a good 3D platformer, so I’m in

The Origami King arrived yesterday and I’ve so far put about 5 hours into it. Despite sounding like a broken record, I’m very much in the camp of ‘the first two are incredible, with TTYD bordering on a masterpiece’. SPM was really great for what it was and then Sticker Star came along and was a horrible mess of a game that utterly missed the mark in almost every aspect. After that, Color Splash was an underwhelming but overall playable and at times fun little romp through the Paper Mario universe that I have no desire to ever play again.

So, TOK? I remember starting up CS and after a couple hours knowing EXACTLY how I felt about it and how I would feel about it with time. And I was right. It was fine. This one, though, after 5 hours is feeling kind of special.

Maybe it’s the tempered expectations but so far I am having so much fun with the latest Paper Mario. The writing is consistently top tier, the music is incredible, it looks beautiful, the world is fun and rewarding to explore, there’s a new idea packed into every new screen. It kind of feels like TTYD had a baby with CS and thus TOK was born. I don’t see it surpassing either of the first two, or maybe even the third, mainly due to a repetitive battle system that isn’t outright offensive but does begin to grate all too quickly. But going in, knowing what to expect, I have been thoroughly surprised and I can’t wait to get back to it after work

Just dropping a comment to observe the oddity that is NL referring to Wario as Mario's "alter-ego"

@Dodger Never before have I agreed with a comment so intensely. Perfectly and objectively summed up the experience of being a Paper Mario fan, well done you

@PBandSmelly they aren't making baseball games, they're too busy being blonde boyz doing what blonde boyz do

I actually really like this character 😬 I think it's genuinely funny and what better platform to try out some goofy, nonsensical characters than in a game with as little stakes as Dr Mario World

@Crono1973 I've got to ask, are you trolling? I'm just genuinely curious, is this a character you're doing or what? I just find it somewhat difficult to believe that anybody could possibly take themself so seriously that they would unironically say something like 'think of it as port begging control'.

Either way, I suggest you find a more productive use of your time.

Unrelated note, I hope they bring TTYD to Switch!! 😍😍 Pleeeeeaaaaase Nintendo!!

@james_squared @bunkerneath I think it's the green toy gun that essentially acts as that game's machine gun that's being referred to. Rapidly shot out little plunger darts

@ChromaticDracula I'm a huuuuge fan of the M&L games, have been playing them on release since Partners in Time. The interesting thing is that I was actually pretty disappointed with the last two entries so the fact you enjoyed them and still have yet to dive into the first three is very exciting! I hope you love them, PiT and BiS in particular are wonderful

Hey Chris, I have a genuine question that I was pondering the other day and this review brought it back to mind.

As far as I can tell, a large number of journalists dont like the idea that the publications they write for are a hive mind of people but instead that one person within that publication may review a game higher or lower than another, rightly so as you're all individuals. Yet, the trend has been, for as long as I can remember, that when reviewing a game, the author will say 'we didn't like x' or 'y had us struggling to work out what to do next', which only facilitates the hive mind issue. I ask now because I know you, in particular from reading your TOH articles, take issue with this. It makes more sense within this review as it's a multiplayer focused game, just wondering about your thoughts wrt this

@sevex as a big fan of the series, I can second that Laytons Mystery Journey was one of my biggest disappointments in gaming. Having seen it through 100%, it has a very disjointed and uninteresting narrative, a dull cast and the worst puzzles of the series. Really was very gutted when I played this one

@Nedtendo Interesting you'd take this stance. Clearly, you either aren't a fan of the Xenoblade Chronicles series or the removal of the option to alter the breast size of a 13 year old character in XCX just didnt bother you - in which case, you are not the demographic for these titles.

Censorship is wrong no matter what. You have to respect the artist's original vision, so if the creator of Fatal Frame wanted you to run around in the cold, dark woods snapping ghouls in an outfit that barely covers any of the strong, female protagonist's hot body then it should stay.

It's not about the beautiful curvy ladies. It's about the art.

@HaTTrick71 I think you've just adopted some strange defeatist attitude to life and are allowing yourself to be marketed to and more susceptible to it. I can pinpoint where the majority of what I look for in a movie comes from and I can assure you it isn't from huge blockbusters or a single superhero flick. My love for cinema stems from a lot of obscure British surreal comedies that had passion pumped into them and it's that passion that made me passionate and it's also exactly what I look for in a craft.

You seem set in your ways and that's fine, but your tone is very condescending so I dont much fancy continuing this conversation. I dont like to be told what I'm unaware of when actually what you're spouting is a very obvious and apparent practice (marketing and trends) but instead of looking at yourself and others as humans who have a whole plethora of different influences and interests, you're implying we're just blank slates that are being projected on to.

It's a very odd stance

@HaTTrick71 not at all, if I'm going to see a movie from a director that I particularly adore, I'll be more likely to go in expecting good things and going easier on it. Though, to rebuke this, Edgar Wright is my favourite working director and I went into Baby Driver expecting to love it but was hugely disappointed.

I do understand we have biases. I'm merely making the argument that that's somewhat irrelevant right now seeing as I went in to Detective Pikachu expecting good things and being aware of the relative pedigree behind it. What I dont agree with is the idea of being conditioned to like certain things

@HaTTrick71 haha I'm not hiding behind anything, I have a movie review blog and a podcast about media, graduated film studies at university three years ago. I think I know how to analyse a movie and how to look objectively at the quality of the craft as opposed to subjective factors.

There are great movies releasing constantly, they just require a bit of searching out. A24, for example, are huge bastions for interesting and beautiful movies that challenge the norms big studios like Marvel are bringing in that people are accepting as quality cinema.

Look back through my comment history, I wrote on a Detective Pikachu article way before it came out that I was very hyped for it because I thought it looked like it would, against all odds, actually be a decent, if nothing else, fun romp. But it wasnt. It failed at even being fun. I haven't been conditioned to like anything and I dont go with the flavour of the month. I will give any movie the time of day (just saw Joker, for example, despite hating the rest of Todd Phillips' output and thought it was perfectly fine). To insinuate I've been brainwashed by studios telling me what's good and what's not when it's an industry I am very passionate about and hope to one day work within is very patronising

@Fath I'd agree the world building was great, especially the opening shot with the Pokemon living in the wild. I loved that, I just think that the charm quickly faded when it became apparent there was very little of substance beneath it

@HaTTrick71 the argument that most of the problems can be found in other movies is irrelevant - it's not wrong but that's also why a huge amount of movies just aren't any good. It takes something special to make a genuinely well-crafted film and this just didnt cut it. In fact, I'd argue it did most of what it set out to do poorly.

I went into it with no biased and I was actually very excited for it - I paid to see it in cinema. And I enjoyed the first 20 minutes or so but after that, the pace ground to a halt and the light-hearted fun and comedy just dropped off a cliff. I was struggling to work out who the target audience even was after that first act. There was nothing to keep the children entertained and for anyone else it was much too dumb and slow

@MarioFan02 I'm not sure you can say Detective Pikachu really worked. I know art's subjective and I'm sure there were people who did enjoy it but really, it suffered from awful writing, a terribly mismanaged pace and constant tonal inconsistencies.

Maybe relative to other videogame adaptations it wasnt so bad but it was by no means good

Just logged in to be pedantic and say there are no stairs on the NA/EU art - he's just stood on a cog in the foreground.

More on topic, the Japanese cover gets my vote, while not a fan of the character designs, I like the cinematic framing more

@Doktor-Mandrake did you ever manage to get your hands on that mutant bear or are you still experimenting?

@nessisonett have to say, maybe one of the best comments I've seen on this site

@Doktor-Mandrake sweet Spaced reference brother!

@AlternateButtons you're either trolling or an idiot. Whichever one you're happy with

@Sabrewing I direct you to this article by the great Chris Scullion:

https://tiredoldhack.com/2019/04/08/14-things-you-should-never-say-to-a-games-journalist/

If you're too lazy to read it, I'll paraphrase. Saying 'slow news day?' is a lazy and trite thing to do. Because it probably genuinely is a slow news day and you saying that doesn't make you clever or interesting. The exact opposite of both of those things, in fact. It isn't good discussion and just makes you look like an obnoxious idiot. Leave it out. Nobody appreciates it at all.

@Lizuka I think this is a very different case from the examples you gave. Rather than a troubled, unsatisfactory product being handed to another team to try and fix, Namco Bandai's version was altogether scrapped as far as I can tell and Retro have started from the very beginning. What this means is that a potentially bad game was thrown away, the original developer considered not good enough and it has instead been handed to the team who originally made the fantastic trilogy. Essentially, there's no signifier this new version is troubled or struggling, just that it's only just starting production.

@Ricube @Yasume I direct you to this article that would suggest Retro have been hard at work on an original IP:

https://www.nintendolife.com/news/2019/04/rumour_did_reggie_just_give_us_our_first_glimpse_at_a_new_retro_studios_project

It's not set in stone but I think this is very promising that they have been finally developing an original project. It's evidenced more by the guy from Retro replying to it with a cheeky wink. I think, if you're a Retro or Metroid fan, there's a lot to look forward to.

@Not_Soos @Majora101 I would like to jump on the Starfox Adventures love train. If you go in expecting a Starfox game, you'll be disappointed. However, go in expecting an action RPG with great atmosphere, writing, level variety and worlds and you'll be very happy. I will stand by this game until the day I die. It was a whole lot of fun and I would do unspeakable things for a remaster, as unlikely as that may be

@JHDK @PBandSmelly be 100% honest, have either of you played Yooka-Laylee? I ask because, while it was nowhere close to being a great game, I think the only way you can come to describe it as a 'disaster' or 'garbage' is by having seen online reactions to it. It wasn't fantastic at all, it was fine, but to throw so much hate on to it really only seems to be from riding the Internet hate that the game received. It wasn't a terrible game or even a bad game. It was just okay. This sort of hyperbole is only detrimental.

I, for one, am very excited for any upcoming project from these provenly talented people.

@ShadJV yeah, I get that, I was just trying to offer reassurance incase you were unaware

@ShadJV if you 100% Layton's Mystery Journey, a little box pops up saying 'Katrielle will return in another adventure'. While it's far from confirmation, what with plans often changing based on a number of factors, it's at least something.

Anyway, as a huuuuge fan of the Layton games, I really didn't enjoy this one. Felt very disjointed and underwhelming both in puzzles and narrative. Wasn't a big fan of Miracle Mask, Azran Legacy or Vs Phoenix Wright for that matter but those first four are genuinely magical games. As a self-proclaimed sucker, I'll buy whatever this series throws my way

@mist @SuperWeird I love the Mario series and most Nintendo series' in general for the very reason that almost every player takes something else from them. For me, 3D World was the weakest entry in the 3D Mario platformers to date but I think it's amazing that two people here would call it their favourite. Different strokes for different folks, whatever you look for in a game, Nintendo always deliver quality

@scully1888 @Dogorilla I want to say a big thank you to Dogorilla! I was completely unaware of the site, I've been sitting on the till at work since 2pm reading articles and reviews on Tired Old Hack. Really great stuff and I think I've found my new internet haunt

I was reading this review and I got to the “actually dear, it’s more commonly known as Gradius” line and instantly thought 'damn, thats a good joke. Reminds me of the ONM days.'

I scroll up and what do I see? Written by one Chris Scullion. I would love if you ever found the time to get more reviews out. As an avid reader of ONM back in the day, I often find myself getting nostalgic for it. You're a wonderful journalist and you inject your writing with such a class British humour, I can't get enough of it

@ZoinkGames just to give you a little more (late) love, I have to say Stick it to the Man! is honestly the greatest indie title I have ever played. I bought it back on Wii U and I don't know if it just came along at the right time or what, but I instantly fell in love with it. The charm, the characters, the atmosphere, the style, the writing, I was in awe at how well crafted this was as a narrative experience and so, so funny to boot. I've recommended it to countless friends, one of whom bought it at the time due to my recommendation and it still comes up in discussion between us to this day.

I was in a game store a few weeks back and saw Flipping Death physical so I picked it up in a heartbeat. I've still yet to play it as I'm trying to clear out my backlog one game at a time, but I am PUMPED to get to it. I've also recently downloaded SittM! on my Switch to support you guys and also to play through just before I start FD.

You guys are truly special devs and I'm so happy to have people like you guys making games like this

@Franklin blood. Blood. Blood... and bits of sick.

I have a feeling we'd get on, what with you knowing Darkplace AND basing your account on my favourite bumbling magician/ventriloquist's racially insensitive pal.

You referenced one of my favourite shows and my heart went all a-flutter. Doesn't get much better than Darkplace

@SterlingEyes also pitching into a conversation I wasn't invited to.

Just to say, if you haven't played it before, play Majora's Mask. While it's perhaps the most divisive Zelda title, if it clicks with you it will ABSOLUTELY click with you like no other game. For me, it is the greatest game I have ever played. It is absolutely jam-packed with atmosphere and interesting, intricate characters. On top of that, every single one of them has their own 3-day cycle in which they come to deal with the impending apocalypse. The game is, simply put, a masterpiece in almost every way and every time I talk about it, I remind myself of why I'm so in love with it, with Zelda and with gaming

@HalBailman I think you may be beyond saving. Too stubborn or too dumb, maybe both. All the best to you, may you find a morsel of happiness in that very narrow-minded little life of yours. Maybe Sega will re-release that 16 year old game specifically tailored to you so you can finally move on with life and learn something exotic and new like social skills.

(For reference so you don't embarrass yourself again in future with misuse, that was trolling)

@HalBailman giving an informed and reasonable argument against somebody isn't being a troll. I wasn't purposely provoking you for no reason, calling somebody a troll is just a cop-out response for someone who can't be bothered to accept other people are allowed to disagree with you in a public forum.

Saying they don't know what makes F-Zero tick just cements my comments. That's your OPINION and other people may find enjoyment from a product for other reasons. If you're the anomaly here, maybe consider that YOU'RE the one that doesn't understand what makes it tick.

This ire comes less from specifically your comments (though they do embody my frustration pretty well) and more from continuously hearing that 'critics are stupid, they liked X and hated Y', painting them all with one brush. However, if these people actually read around a bit, they'd find a whole gambit of different opinions and ratings from a huge variety of critics. You calling people with an opinion different to yours idiots was sort of the icing on the cake that made me think 'maybe I should step in and let this fella know that we don't all share a hive mind and that's okay'

@electrogeist as for you, you're trying too hard

@HalBailman saying that critics are idiots or that anyone with a differing opinion is an idiot, in turn, makes you come across as VERY simple-minded.

Having a different opinion to someone is, of course, fine and to be expected. All entertainment is subjective. Dismissing all critics is ridiculously idiotic as, if you look at Any game, their will be publications that scored it high and those that scored it low. The exception being if a game is undeniably good or poor quality, in which case a consensus is normally met. Do you know why this is? Its because, like anybody, critics are humans that experience and react to games differently.

Now go away and either cry some more over how your precious, precious game wasn't exactly how YOU wanted it or, and I think this is the better option, grow up.

@mcdreamer I'm currently playing through XC1 too! How far in are you?? I'm about 60 hours in and I feel like progress is immensely slow. Don't get me wrong, it's wonderful but whenever I get to a new area I spend around 10 hours there exploring and doing sidequests! I'm a stickler for continuity so need to finish this and X before hitting 2!

Also, very jealous of you getting to play Galaxy for the first time. That and its sequel are two of the greatest games I've ever played

Read the title as 'Dark Sword of Goblin Lands'

@Mogster I don't know, a lot of creative people get really burnt out on their projects and, by the time they're done with them, they want nothing more than to get away from them and enjoy almost anything else. Just look at Trey Parker.

Sakurai, in particular, always seems to be very burnt out with Smash so it was actually quite nice to read that he likes to play in his surely limited spare time

@Kirby-in-Kirkby not true! If you play against a good Smash player, you'll know about it.

It's sort of the beauty of the game. If you want to take the time to sit down and learn the intricacies of fighting, such as dodges and grabs, there's a very deep and difficult to master game here. And that's without mentioning individual characters' strengths and weaknesses. On the other side of the coin, if you want to just jump in, button mash and play casually, that's also very possible. It's this accessibility mixed with the option to really dig in that makes this series so masterful.

I only actually started trying to get properly decent at the game when I played Smash 4 and have found the series to be much more gratifying since

@Heavyarms55 dude, I don't know what you're saying! When I heard about the concept of a Detective Pikachu movie, I was a frontrunner for mocking it endlessly and saying how awful the idea was. After that trailer though man, I've made a complete 180. The writing genuinely looks quite sharp and funny and some of the set-pieces rather creative. Not to mention, it looks interesting visually. I have gone from despising the very idea of it to being pumped for it in the space of one trailer.

Sonic, on the other hand, seems to be completely and utterly unsalvageable. It's a horrible idea and any media they've released of it so far only makes it look worse

@AlternateButtons @RetiredR @darkswabber @MegaVel91 @KayFiOS @ElectricGhost @Scottwood101

I literally have never seen a joke go over SO many people's heads!!! I'm not sure I want to be part of this community anymore if everybody is this DUMB.

And with regards to the 'should have added /s' comment, do you ask stand up comedians to please clarify whether what they've said is serious or a joke? Just that I'm unable to decipher basic sentence structure!

Really riled me up seeing all of you come at this guy for what is clearly a damn joke. Just take a minute to use your brains rather than jump to a witch hunt. You're all just as bad as the people you're painting scottwood out to be.

@sikthvash play Paper Mario 64! While I found Sticker Star and Color Splash to be quite disappointing, if you enjoyed Thousand Year Door (my 2nd favourite game of all time) you'll absolutely love 64. It is a truly, truly special game

@goggles789 haha 'buzz off kid', what are you, an 80s movie? I don't get why you're being so standoffish, I was merely pointing out the merits of public backing whilst also weighing that up with some reasoning, explaining why I understand why someone might be hesitant. Yet you're coming back super defensive for literally no reason.

Guess I've found a Mighty No 9 backer

@goggles789 not really relevant to what I said but ok 👍