Game Reviews scoring 5/10
Review Kingdom Hearts III + Re:Mind - Cloud Version (Switch) - Shot Through The Heart
Re:Mind us not to buy this
And so we come to the end – for now – of Tetsuya Nomura’s iconic and in-no-way-confusing Kingdom Hearts series. Additionally, then, this is the end of our excursion into the nebulous Cloud; pun extremely intended. Yet, of course, for all the shade we throw at the concept of Cloud Versions and the myriad flaws they...
We put Cloud in your cloud
We begged for this, you know. We begged on our damn, dirty knees for Kingdom Hearts to come to Switch. Not Melody of Memory, that's a half-measure. We wanted the full shebang, 1.5 + 2.5 ReMix. And now we've got it... in the most cursed form possible, a Cloud Version. Don't worry, we're not going to spend the whole review...
Review GetsuFumaDen: Undying Moon (Switch) - A Dead Ringer From Konami That Struggles To Succeed
Packed with potential — and not much else
It takes mere moments to notice that GetsuFumaDen: Undying Moon, the welcome revival of Konami's Famicom-exclusive action/RPG hybrid GetsuFumaDen, is the once-respected publisher's uncomfortably close take on Dead Cells' excellent 'action roguelite' gameplay. There's the opening room containing a visual...
Review Blackwind (Switch) - Hack 'N' Slash Mech Mayhem That Misses The Mark
Not much wind in these sails
Once upon a time in an unfortunate culinary incident, this writer managed to accidentally create a bowl of literally flavorless Jell-O. The Jell-O (that's jelly to you UK folk) was cold, completely clear, chewy, and somehow managed to leave a massive impression, solely because of how its flavor left absolutely no...
Review Danganronpa S: Ultimate Summer Camp (Switch) - Fanservice Aplenty, But A Total Grindfest
A Killing Game for your wallet
As we've established previously, Danganronpa is pretty skeevy in its narrative. Thankfully, though, it has managed to avoid bringing said skeev outside of its world, outside of the fictional space that makes it somewhat more palatable. Danganronpa S: Ultimate Summer Camp, unfortunately, rather breaks that promise. The...
Review Cotton Guardian Force Saturn Tribute (Switch) - Great Games Let Down By Poor Ports
A slightly troublesome trio of tributes
This trio of retro shmups — Cotton 2, Cotton Boomerang and Guardian Force — have released under the “Saturn Tribute” umbrella (bundled together on a physical cartridge in Japan that's recently been announced for the West, or available individually via your local eShop at the time of wr
Review Embr (Switch) - A Spark Of Co-Op Potential, But Never Catches Fire On Switch
In the line of fire
At first blush Muse Games' Embr put us in mind of riotous slapstick comedy titles such as Overcooked and Tarsier Games' excellent The Stretchers. This is a bright and colourful multiplayer-focused mess of firefighting carnage that also presents itself as a wry satirical take on the state of 21st Century capitalism. It's got the...
Review Knockout Home Fitness (Switch) - Too Limited And Lightweight To Be A Contender
Fails to pack a punch
The Switch is slowly but surely becoming home to a new dawn of fitness games. The success of Ring Fit Adventure has clearly inspired a new batch of keep-fit titles, with the likes of Fitness Boxing 2, Active Life Outdoor Challenge and even Nintendo’s limited release Jump Rope Challenge all vying for a piece of the fitness...
Review SkateBIRD (Switch) - A Chirpy, Charming Tony Hawk-Alike That Fails To Stick The Landing
Flip the bird
The skateboarding game, as a genre, has been under-explored. Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater defined it with such finesse in 1999 that there has barely been any room for improvement – as borne out by the continuing appeal of that first game two decades later. But considering how much it has in common with a 3D platformer – open...
Mini Review The Magnificent Trufflepigs (Switch) - A Metal-Detecting Sim Short On Magnificence
beep beep beep BEEBEEBEEBEEP
From day one, The Magnificent Trufflepigs — a game about metal-detecting and romance — came out swinging for the fences with prestige TV powerhouse AMC (of Walking Dead, Mad Men, and Breaking Bad fame) as publishers. But is it the equivalent of a stash of rare Roman coins, or just another rusty bottlecap? The story...
Review Monster Harvest (Switch) - Poor Execution Of A Promising 'Stardew Valley X Pokémon' Premise
It hurt itself in its confusion!
It must be tough to be a hopeful dev working on a farm sim project. Stardew Valley—a simple looking project made by one guy—has so effectively raised the bar for what a pure farm sim can be that matching it seems almost impossible by this point. The only way that a new game could feasibly beat it would be by...
Brave Souls and the Phantom Nomad Eaters
We live in a golden age of remasters and remakes when it comes to video games. It seems like every week there are more classic games that are getting new life on a current gen console. This might seem like a crass attempt to squeeze a few more pennies out of gamers (and in many cases it is), but it is also...
Review Worms Rumble (Switch) - Fun Traversal, But A Limited Battle Royale Spin-Off
War has changed
If you’ve ever played a Worms game, chances are you know more or less how it works by now. Two or more teams wage war within the confines of a 2D destructible arena, each taking turns to make their move in a strategic battle of wits and firepower. It’s a formula that, despite some missteps here and there, simply works. So when...
Review Alex Kidd In Miracle World DX (Switch) - Vintage Sega Hero In Mediocre Remake
Putting the sham in Roshambo
We know we're risking the ire of several hundred very cross Sega Master System fans by saying this, but we have to be blunt — the original Alex Kidd in Miracle World, while inarguably an important and formative classic, is and always has been an exceptionally flawed game. Don't get us wrong, there's plenty to like and...
Review Ninja Gaiden: Master Collection (Switch) - Ryu Hayabusa Deserves Better Than This
Ninja Gaiden Whack
Whether you prefer Ninja Gaiden Sigma over Ninja Gaiden Black, or 'vanilla' part two over its enhanced edition, or don’t really care either way and just wanna get on with slicing and dicing everything in your path, the prospect of enjoying Team Ninja’s legendary action series on Switch is a pretty tantalising one. Here is a...
Review Warhammer Age Of Sigmar: Storm Ground (Switch) - Ruined By Roguelike Repetition
Flawhammer
Games Workshop – where nobody has a nice time. Okay, let us clarify; it’s entirely possible to have a nice time playing their games or painting their models or – heck – even chatting to their legendarily helpful and inclusive staff. But pick a world, pick a game and we’d be hard-pressed to say that any character is having a...
Review World's End Club (Switch) - A Real Looker Spoiled By Hit-And-Miss Storytelling
"I said I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard."
Zero Escape and Danganronpa are two of the most notable names in the visual novel space, so fans were understandably excited when the creators of these two juggernauts were revealed to be teaming up for a new project: World’s End Club. After a soft launch on Apple Arcade,...
Bombs Away! ...Eventually
With an influx of incredible modern takes on classic titles such as Tetris 99, Pac-Man 99, and the short-lived Super Mario Bros. 35, Super Bomberman R Online feels like the video game equivalent of a kid picked last for the sports team; an altogether scrappier, less elegant battle royale title than its peers, but one that...
Review Pathway (Switch) - Competent XCOM-Style Combat, But Is That Enough?
It belongs in a museum
Every now and then, you play one of those games that just feels a little bit too late. It’s not that a game in this category is bad or doesn’t have good ideas, but sometimes it’s just a victim of the current gaming landscape. How many Metroidvanias have you played by now? What about roguelites or 2D
Mini Review Super Baseball Simulator 1.000 (SNES) - 16-Bit Sports With Super Powers
Serious simulation, honest
With five new additions to Nintendo Switch Online's catalogue of NES and SNES games arriving today, we decided to review these new/old releases to help you decide which to play first. Enjoy! With a name like Super Baseball Simulator 1.000, you mig
Review King Of Seas (Switch) - Naval Combat Gets Grindy After A Promising Start
Yo, ho! (a grinder's life for me)
3DClouds, the studio behind racers such as All-Star Fruit Racing, Xenon Racer, and Race With Ryan have taken time away from the circuit and are back with a procedurally generated pirate adventure that charges players with becoming the one true King of the Seas. There's a touch of Sid Meier's Pirates here, a dash of...
Review Layers Of Fear 2 (Switch) - A Decent Premise, But A Disappointing Sequel
Layers of Persevere
Polish developer Bloober Team has produced something of a mixed bag thus far when it comes to their horror/psychological thriller game output, with the likes of Observer and the first Layers of Fear definitely feeling like their most successful efforts to date. However, for every riveting, Rutger Hauer-flavoured cyberpunk horror...
Review SpongeBob: Krusty Cook-Off (Switch) - A Bit Undercooked
We do this for forty years, and then we die
Though not always deserved, mobile games have long since obtained a reputation for being rather shallow and money-grubbing affairs. And though the mobile space actually accounts for the lion’s share of the profits raked in by the game industry year over year, this monetary growth is seen by many to come...
Review The Longing (Switch) - Tedious By Design, And Incredibly Successful At It
For a minute there, I lost myself
There’s a section of the acclaimed Windows adventure game The Neverhood entitled “The Hall of Records”. It’s essentially a (very) long gag – screen after screen of rooms, full to the brim with quite bizarre text. It takes what feels like hours to make it through with main character Klaymen’s agonisingly...
Review Battle Axe (Switch) - A Battling Throwback That Doesn't Land All Its Hits
Lord have Mercia
Veteran pixel artist Henk Nieborg's old-school throwback, Battle Axe, seeks to replicate the classic top-down hack and slash action of arcade classics such as Gauntlet, Knights of the Round and Golden Axe. With Nieborg himself on graphical duties and legendary composer Manami Matsumae (Mega Man, Final Fight, Shovel Knight) providing...
Mini Review Future Aero Racing S Ultra (Switch) - Clever Ideas, But FAR From A New F-Zero
We want to WipEout its music from our memory, too
It’s not exactly the best time for fans of futuristic racing. With no new F-Zero on the horizon and the WipEout series seemingly dead, too, fans have to turn to the independent scene in the hope that something almost as good will do the trick. The Switch has a couple of decent options already...
Review Stitchy In Tooki Trouble (Switch) - Pretty But Painfully Average DKC-Inspired Platforming
Sure to cause a straw man argument
A scarecrow is a creation built to deceive. A visual signifier of something greater. A simulacrum intended to impress, but when approached, the illusion shatters. Conveniently, Stitchy in Tooki Trouble is much the same. At first glance, it’s a rather attractive pillaging of Donkey Kong Country Returns, borrowing...
Review Poison Control (Switch) - Entertaining To A Point, But Lacking Where It Counts
To Hell and back
Sometimes the only way to get to Heaven is to go to Hell. At least, that’s the case in Poison Control, the newest game from Nippon Ichi Software to make it to western shores. This single-player action-RPG/shooter has a lot of charm and characters with real personality, though they are a bit cliché at points. Poison Control...
Review Cozy Grove (Switch) - A Great-Looking But Flawed Animal Crossing-Alike, With Ghosts
Animal Crossing over to the other side
Back in the Wii and DS era, Nintendo tried something new: telling its players to take breaks. We're no strangers to the Animal Crossing all-nighter, and it seemed like Nintendo was finally starting to worry about our health, but very few people actually heeded the gentle warning. You're not our mum, Nintendo...
Mini Review Moon Raider (Switch) - Cute Visuals Mask A Mediocre Metroidvania
Lara Croft goes ‘Jason X’
Another day, another attempt to replicate the Metroidvania titles of yore. Moon Raider is an attractive, yet wholly unremarkable game with barely a sliver of originality. Taking place on, well, the moon, you take on the role of Ava, whose mother has fallen ill. In a brief, rather poorly constructed introductory cutscene...
