Puzzle games and slightly risqué images of female models go together like strawberries and cream, or minced beef and custard, depending on who you ask. Assuming the latter is a peach worth plucking, SilverStarJapan have decided to bring Please Teach Me Onedari Shogi to the Nintendo Switch on the North America eShop for $7.99... entirely in Japanese.
That's right, it seems that translating the game into English wasn't part of their action plan, but if you happen to have a smattering of Japanese or just think you can blindly grope your way through regardless, here's what the game details page promises:
The Onedari Girls are Shogi novices.
When they face a difficult situation, they request a “Do-Over” or “Hint.”
Accept their requests to get along with the girls!
When you get to know them better, you will receive a special treat...
Equipped with a function that helps you feel like you can teach the girls Shogi even if you are a beginner!
Shogi game for adults.
Each girl featured also comes with a brief description of their virtual likes, dislikes, and of course, measurements:
Hanamiya Inori
- Birthday: January 18
- Height: 164 cm (5’4”)
- Measurements: T92, U70 (under-bust), H95 (cm) (T: 36, U: 28, H: 37 (in))
- Likes: Cosplay, sushi, chocolate!
- Dislikes: Bugs, ghosts, vegetables!
- Comments:
I’m Inori Hanamiya, a half-Japanese and half-Chinese cosplayer.
I would be happy if you played with me!
Be nice to me!
There are games like this that have been released on the Japanese eShop in the past, and given the Switch's popularity, it's not totally surprising.
Are you keen to teach these still shots of young ladies how best to play the game shogi whilst on public transport? Let us know in the comments below.
Comments 26
"I would be happy if you played with me!"
Somehow my brain refuses to understand that sentence the way it should.
@Rhaoulos That sentence was even funnier after reading the title as "Tutor Your 2.5D Girlfriend In Please Touch Me Onedari Shogi, Coming To Nintendo Switch"
I'm guessing I'm not the last person today to read it that way
I wouldn't mind to have Chinese "chess" on the Switch, but the whole girlfriend thing makes it weird to me and will not buy.
@aesz Hehhh.. It's not just Japan... Take a look at Mortal Kombat. That's one awfully weird title. and that is a mainstream game.
For that very very very very very very very very very very specific customer base.
And people say Fire Emblem is a niche series!
Ah well, to each their own. I have no interest in this, but there is no harm it in. I'd bet half their sales go to people buying it ironically or as a joke for some YouTube channel.
Inb4 the moral police arrive. Not buying it, but I won't judge anyone who only wants to play this game for boobs and butts only. Plus they're all over 18 so it ain't wrong.
"Hanamiya Inori
We have the same birthday! It must be fate! animu theme song plays
I actually wouldn't mind a game teaching me how to play Shogi.
I guess, in this case, I'd be the girlfriend.
@MadCow74 I know, right? Girls are gross!
"Likes: Cosplay, sushi, chocolate!
Dislikes: Bugs, ghosts, vegetables"
Oh I'll teach her alright. Teach her about the benefits of a healthy diet and the nutrients of vegetables
I would rather have one of these girls teach me a few moves.
Shogi moves, honest.
@MajinSoul Give her a dish of streamed carrots.
I like my women 2D and in English thank you very much
This is degrading to shogi...
This would have made chess club a lot more enjoyable when I was growing up
@mrmememan same. But i love all women honestly.
@MadCow74 Shogi is Japanese "chess" with 20 pieces, while Chinese "chess" (Xiangqi) is different and has 16 pieces like normal chess.
@Dakotastomp I meant in a different way
I noticed this was on the shop when I was just browsing around. It wasn’t hard to miss with the pic on there.
Threw up a little in my mouth
Oh asian girls.
Yum.
@SmaggTheSmug Sure! I'd be up for a threesome... teaching session.
They didn't even animate the girls, it's just pictures. It would have been way better if they had used video instead.
Hey, I recognize one of the name, Satou Airi. Don't ask me how I know though. And don't google her, kids.
I generally prefer girls with their T number greater than or the same as their H number.
We have a Daddy dating simulator, so now we have a Japanese woman-teaching game?
Wow, seems like the Switch is regrettably getting some LGBT love?
I wish more developers would release their games in their original form if they don't have the assets for localization.
@Ralizah I have the Japanese eshop release of the game, you don't really teach yourself unless you spend a lot of time memorizing how each piece moves. The teaching part is just you sometimes moving for her or let her change her decision, usually just to do the same thing again... Its a fun game.
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