Topic: Nintendo Corrupt-A-Wish

Granted, but you can only use tree branches as weapons, and you can only carry one.

I wish people would stop being so negative on NL.

Ok. There is no criticism and Nintendo does all the wrong things and goes out of business.

I wish to have the master sword in botw already.

Granted, but it self-destructs on each swing, killing Link each time.

I wish that my 3DS would have a longer battery life.

Ok, but all you can play on it is games by Skunk Software and RCMADIAX.

I wish to have unlimited high power and durability shields and weapons in botw.

Granted. Now you end up skipping treasure chests entirely, because they're only going to contain weak weapons you don't need. Forget fighting Bokoblin camps and Hynoxs, better to just face Ganon now and be done with it.

I wish I could invent a perpetual source of energy.

Ok. You now have a machine that uses no energy and perpetually makes sound energy; navi saying hey look listen!

I wish for mk8 deluxe to get dlc for extra cups.

Granted. However, you can only play as baby characters and 50cc while driving in reverse only.

I wish that Nintendo brings back 1080 Snowboarding.

Granted, but they're

Edit: Close post time. Granted, but it returns as 1260 Snowboarding. The reboot took a different direction.

I wish I could get an end game Switch shirt in Breath of the Wild.

... and you can!*

*For 9 monthly payments of 99.99. Terms and conditions apply. Interest not included.

I wish to become a MARIO kart master.

You become a MAR10 kart master! As in, the master of playing Mario Kart only during March 10th. There's not a whole lot of competition, so becoming the master wasn't very hard.

I wish I could have dinner with Eiji Aonuma!

Granted. You eat at Heart Attack Grill and Aonuma and you have a heart attack. Aonuma dies, but you live with the knowledge that you killed him.

I wish I could show off my Switch user icon on NL.

Ok. You cannot talk or you will get escargot shoved in your mouth. EAT IT!

Edit: oops, a minute late!
Granted. However, it is almost completely pixelated and the features cannot be made out.

I wish for Nintendo to host conventions in the style of Star Wars celebration.

Oh, I was about to say that the reply was unrelated.

Granted, but no one goes, because no one is allowed to go. It's a private party for costumed Mario characters.

I wish flame wars weren't so easy to start.

@Nintendoer Granted but that is only because people have mind control chips implanted from birth to make everyone agree.

To piggy back off of your wish: I wish that the majority of people would be honestly kind instead of selfish and mean.

Ok. There is only one person left because the rest died in ww3. He is kind and considerate, so your wish is granted, even though you died.

I wish to be able to identify Nintendo fans easily.

Granted, but it only works on ceiling fans owned by Nintendo Co., Ltd.

I wish I could go back and play every Zelda title as if I had never played it before.

@Alshain01 Granted, but every time you play you can only retain 15 minutes of gameplay and then you forget everything.

I wish more great fighting games would come out this year.

They do. Ouya exclusives.

I wish Fried Chicken was a healthy superfood.

Ok. Chickens are hunted to extinction after a week. Hope you enjoyed it while it lasted!

I wish for switch to get smash 5 by the end of the year.

Granted, because they're all fat, thirty year old men with no job.

I wish I had an eShop gift card.