Topic: I just lost my father.

@Primo40295 : I am also saddened to hear of your bereavement. I have a relative who lost the girl that he was engaged to in his youth (possibly from similar circumstances), and there is a Turkish song that always reminded him of her, and I am reminded of his grief when I hear it (which translates to "Return, My Darling"). He is now happily married and has two young children, but I am sure that the bittersweet memories of his first love will nevertheless linger in his heart. I hope that you can find contentment in the memories that you have created together and be able to someday find love again (if you haven't already).

@Zeldafan79 Words cannot express how sorry I am. Losing a family member is never a great experience, especially if it's without warning. I haven't lost anyone too close in years, though I suspect a step-grandpa of mine will go before too long if his health continues to wane. The last one was my great-grandma right before I started high school. That...was a hard one and didn't make that life transition any easier.

My condolences and prayers, mate. It's completely fine to talk (erm, type) here if you need an outlet. There's also no harm or shame in hashing through this with those you are close to or, if needed, a grief counselor.

As someone who's had to go through two losses tied to family members over the years I know exactly how the first one feels. It takes a long time to process before you just realize the gravity of the situation and it just dawns on you how important they were in your life

Really sorry man. You have my condolences

@Zeldafan79 I am so sorry to hear this. My heart goes out to you and your family. I cannot imagine what you're going through right now. I wish there was something I could say or do that would help you through this.

@Zeldafan79 It's always sudden, and there's nothing that will really make it easier to deal with except for the passage of time.

I'm sorry for your loss.

I’m really sorry to hear that. Truly, I am. Can’t begin to contemplate what’s going on now but I hope you and your family take proper time to mourn, and stay calm, and most importantly stay safe. Don’t let it get you down too much. My heart goes out to you; and it’s awesome to see so many people here that are like minded in that respect.

@Zeldafan79 Sorry for your loss.

I almost didn't go see him at the hospital after he'd passed because i knew seeing him like that would wreck me. I decided i should at least get one last look. When i was first told i barely reacted but all the sudden later in the day it hit me. Now i can't stop the tears.

hey man...
i just lost my father on june 9th like right now, and the whole community here probably knows it.
i had to pause here for a minute to decide what i was gonna say to you next.
i witnessed a really bad deal over here myself, and im trying to rebuild strength, hope and energy little by little to keep pushing as a man.
this is the first time something like this has really happened to me myself.
im over here living in the same place my father left behind to me for now and im trying to put all the pieces of the puzzle together.
im here for you...
were all here for you.
they been here for me through this more than they can possibly know, and they helped me a lot.

My condolences. The loss of a loved one is not an easy thing to go through. I won't lie and tell you that it gets easier with time but it definitely hurts less. Try to remember the good things that he brought to your life as well as the positive ways that you shaped him too. The person he was for you never goes away and will continue to be there in you even if he sadly isn't. Make sure to take some time for yourself to heal, and to be there for those who are also currently suffering from the loss as well. I hope this helps.

yer not alone on that at all. as my father was passing in icu, i thought i wouldnt be able to handle it.
my family thought i was going to leave the hospital.
it was hard watching him die.
after it was all over, i went back in the room again and kissed his head and i made sure i was the last one in the family to see him, just like i was supposed to.
it wrecked me too.
its hasnt even been 2 months for me yet.
id recommend talking to family more often, real friends that you can trust
and coming around here when you want.
@Silly_G left some comments here that are important for you to read.

They said it was sepsis. Basically a blood infection that causes your vital organs to shut down. The catheter he had been wearing got infected. Then his heart just gave out.

@Zeldafan79 I'm so sorry for your loss. My wife's father died suddenly a few years ago. It was hard on the whole family. Give yourself as much time as you need to grieve. Losing a parent is something you'll never fully recover from, but it will get easier as time goes on. Remember to take care of yourself and your family. There's healing in the little things. My heart goes out to you.
Condolences.

Sorry to hear man.

@Zeldafan79 really sorry to hear. Unfortunately I know the feeling quite well as I lost my father to cancer when I was 18. Cry as much as you need as it is better than holding it for long and play games if you can to free your head from everything. I feel I can talk for everyone here that as far as we can on the other side of the monitor we will help as needed.

@zeldafan79 "Only to the degree that our moments afford us some contact with death do we have some chance to glimpse on what insanity all existence is based." - Cioran

Philosophy isn't for everyone but it's helped me in the past with coming to terms how fundamentally absurd life really is. I'm sorry to hear about your dad though and I'm glad you were able to use this site as an outlet. Take as long as you need.

@Zeldafan79 I'm so sorry for your loss, he was obviously a very important, key person in your life and he must have died very unexpectedly. In times like this, you should always talk to friends and family if you can, their support and love will help you through the grief. Most importantly, honour your memories of you and your dad... They are a symbol of your bond and will remain forever with you, even if your dad may be gone.
I wish you happiness and warm memories of your father. Rest in Peace.

Well I got through the funeral and the sad part is over but I'm still bothered by how sudden he died and that none of his family were with him. Also I'd still kinda like to talk to the doctors that were with him when he took his last breath. I'm not trying to blame anyone I just wanna know if he suffered or if he said anything right before the end.

I know I should just let it go and move on but I guess I'm still grieving. At least I'm at the point of acceptance. I'm not crying as much anymore but it'll be a while before I get everything figured out about where my life goes from here.

@Zeldafan79 No, its not normal for human beings to just "Let it go" you lost some body important in your life, of course your going to be sad, of course your going to grieve, Now I'm not saying don't live your life, but I would say that its pretty normal Feeling to have.

Dude, you just went through a significant loss. Nobody would (or should) blame you for taking some more time to grieve and try to get back on the rails. The process is different for everyone. I think talking with the doctors is a good idea, as well as anyone else who might have been close to your dad. Take the time you need. Don't let things screech to a grinding halt, but take it from me - ignoring and not working through your feelings is detrimental.

If you feel you need it, it also wouldn't hurt to seek out grief counseling. A friend of mine sought it out after someone she's very close to was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer (as well as recent losses in her life), and it's been really beneficial.