There are plenty of serious football games out there these days, and actually, there are plenty of football games trying to do the opposite, too, but none seem to go quite as far in the opposite direction as Behold the Kickmen: Ultimate Football Edition.
According to its official description, Behold the Kickmen is "a football game made by someone who has no understanding of, or interest in" the sport. Players start at the very bottom of the Big Boring Football Spreadsheet, 'doing goals' to make their way up to the big time.
In truth, the arcade-style football itself looks pretty entertaining - especially considering the game's designer couldn't care less about the sport. If you haven't already, make sure to check out the trailer above.
BEHOLD THE KICKMEN started as a silly Twitter joke, and evolved like a beautiful flower into the year's least-exciting and mostly-incorrect Football Simulation. It's football, as seen through the eyes of someone with no understanding of, or interest in, the Laws of Football.
Start at the bottom of the Big Boring British Football Spreadsheet system and grind your way up, gruelling match after gruelling match, to become the best at the football that anyone's ever seen, and win the World Cup for your mantelpiece.
FEATURES: Kicking, Passing, Tackling, Squad Management and Doing Goals over and over. There's even a full Story mode, crammed with overblown melodrama and inane decisions to be made.
It's launching on Switch very soon indeed - on the 18th June, in fact - so you'll be able to check it out yourself then. It's received 'very positive' user reviews on Steam since it first launched there back in 2017.
If you're after some lighthearted footie action, this could well be a winner. Let us know if you'll be giving this one a go with a comment below.
Comments 22
Not that I play soccer games, but I do play golf games, and this trend of Switch sports games focusing on everything but the sport itself is of little interest to me. More power to the developers, I suppose, but it all feels rather pointless.
Watching this evolve from Twitter joke to actual game was amazing. Developed by Dan Marshall, who did The Swindle and the Ben & Dan games. Definitely picking this up next week
That's my kind of the footballs
Football sucks immensely, and the fans slightly less so. However, if this games is set out to make fun of this primitive pastime, I'm all for it. lol.
Actually looks pretty good, looks almost like Sensible Soccer in its silliness.
Watson: Who would design "a football game made by someone who has no understanding of, or interest in the sport" Holmes?
Holmes: Elementary, my Dear Watson. Sepp Blatter
Looks like a fun game, very like Sensi back in the day. Love the sense of humour on it too. And they don't use the word soccer which gets them a bonus point.
If it reviews well and the price is decent I'll keep an eye out for it.
This looks fun!
And approximately 1000% more interesting than another FIFA.
Historically it looks more like Kick Off! than Sensi.
as a Brazilian who hates football, this satiric premise speaks to me on a very deep personal level. HOWEVER, still not interested in the gameplay itself, sorry
I agree with the creator that football is one of the worst inventions of mankind. And I'm all for anything that makes a parody out of it. But this still looks rather boring.
Hopefully there will be an online multiplayer for that/
@Benji80 this comment has made the devs lol on Twitter
Now this is a football game I can get behind finally!
@Benji80 it’s silly fun.
There are a ton of realistic sport sims out there, why even try to compete when you can make something silly that stands out and will appeal to an audience not already well catered for?
@Benji80 @JimmySpades I think the point is general parody? I also think there are a lot of people who are just bored of normal sports games... especially people who don't really like sports in the first place. I'm one of them and I'd much, much rather play inazuma eleven or golf story than FIFA or PGA 2021 for example. Outlandish elements make it exciting. I've always thought realistic sports sims were some of the most boring wastes of technology and manpower in modern history. I'd rather play farming simulator 2020. Everyone's entitled to their own opinion though.
Uhh methinks you're being suckered to take the punchline and assume this is all some sort of faff about lean on the sport. I deny the premise that this is all made by some disaffected sports guy on the sidelines. While the parodic take is quite enjoyable I don't see anyone including panels of "stats" or other careful considerations of the sport, in a throwaway play on footsie.
that's only my read on it though
If I had to grab a casual soccer game out there, it'd be Super Soccer Blast over this one.
Not sure why but the trailer suddenly has me wanting a soccer version of Super Blood Hockey where we can take out players with sliding tackles & soccerballs to the face. Here's hoping.
Ball. Kick. Goal
@JimmySpades Ever played Mario Gold Advance tour? I thought it was a decent mix of RPG and golfing. and I have am not a sports guy what so ever.
@RiderKicker
Dude. This isn't a soccer game. It's a football game. And there's no such thing as a soccerball. And while I like your suggestion of a super violent football game, I'm fairly sure that concept has been copywrited by Millwall fans. Good luck taking it off them.
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