We here at Nintendo Life are always hungry because, while not many are aware, writing about Nintendo everyday works up a massive appetite. So it’s only natural that when the new Pokémon Scarlet and Violet trailer revealed another food-themed Pokémon, we couldn’t help but wonder how it would taste.
Scarlet and Violet aren’t the only games with edible Pokémon in them, however. Of the approximately 37 billion Pokémon now discovered, we uncovered 11 food-themed Pokémon and their evolutionary lines – excluding fish, most plants, and Pokémon that otherwise have no food motif (hey, we love us some jamón but we're not throwing Lechonk in here just yet) – and ranked them by how much we’d want to eat them. No, we haven’t had lunch yet. Why do you ask?
So, let's start in descending order with a little side dish, shall we?
#11 - Smoliv
Smoliv is an olive. While we enjoy olives paired with other food – cheese, wine, pizza toppings – we do not recommend trying to eat an olive raw. Olives are said to be so bitter before being cured into the salty and slightly tangy form we know and love that they’re inedible.
If you threw Smoliv into a brine for about a year or so, we think it’d taste pretty great paired with some Miltank cheese. Too bad there isn’t a wine-themed Pokémon yet. Better yet – grinding Smoliv into oil to drizzle onto our hypothetical PokéPizza.
Who would do such a thing to the Pokémon universe’s newest – and arguably cutest – grass-type addition, you might ask? We would. We’re famished.
#10 - Tropius
We don’t want to eat all of Tropius, a Pokémon which we’d argue ranks near the top of the list of strangest designs, yet we must admit the banana-like fruit hanging from its chin intrigues us. It looks a lot like a nanab berry, though none of its Pokédex entries confirm or deny this.
However, Tropius ranks low on this list simply because the fruit it produces look a lot like chin hairs. Would you want to eat a fruit grown from an animal’s chin? No, we wouldn’t either.
Yet we can’t help but wonder how Tropius’s fruit would taste mashed, mixed with sugar, butter, eggs, some baking soda, and then thrown into an oven at 180°C for an hour. We could go for some nanab bread right about now.
#9 - Sinistea and Polteageist
While Nintendo Life is based out of the UK, we found it difficult to rank this tea-based Pokémon any higher than 11th. We love a good cup of tea – perhaps served with a splash of Micery – but the fact that Sinistea and Polteageist are ghosts troubles us. Ghost-type Pokémon have some of the most frightening Pokédex entries, and despite these two having rather mild entries in comparison, we can’t trust that they won’t syphon a little bit of our soul with every sip.
We prefer our tea without the risk of possession.
#8 - Exeggcute and Exeggutor
You’d be forgiven for thinking that an Exeggcute consists of a group of six eggs when, in fact, they more closely resemble plant seeds (according to several Pokédex entries). It's said Crabrawler often hunts Exeggcute and climbs Exeggutor in search of coconuts, so we assume these two Pokémon taste a lot like actual coconuts.
We’re not the biggest fan of coconut, but some Exeggcute or Exeggutor shredded on top of some pancakes or baked into some chocolate cookies sounds pretty tasty.
#7 - Togepi
Sorry Misty – turn your back for a moment, and we’d snatch up that Togepi to make a delicious bowl of oyakodon. For those unaware, oyakodon is a Japanese dish made from both chicken and eggs that translates literally into ‘parent-and-child bowl.’ Togepi evolves into bird-like Pokémon, so it must taste somewhat like chicken, right?
Simmered in a broth of soy sauce and chicken stock before topping a bowl of rice, Togepi looks a lot like a convenient way to make oyakodon with the least amount of fuss. We just hope that its colourful shell doesn’t get stuck in our teeth.
#6 - Swirlix and Slurpuff
Swirlix is a sentient piece of cotton candy that evolves into a sentient cupcake. Its Pokédex entries state its ‘fur’ does in fact smell and taste like cotton candy, so we can take a little leap of faith and assume its evolution, Slurpuff, tastes like a cupcake, meringue, or cream puff. We don’t really know which, but we wouldn’t say no to visiting a cafe in Kalos to sample for ourselves – perhaps with a side of Sinistea and a ‘coconut’ cookie made from one of Exeggutor’s heads.