Angry Golf is perhaps the most apt title for a video game ever. This isn’t because the main character has a permanently furrowed brow, but rather for how the game makes you feel while you’re playing it. It’s one of the most poorly designed, unfinished games we've played on the Switch, and the golf gameplay feels like it’s almost entirely reliant on random luck rather than skill. In short, it’s a game that will make you seethe with rage.
Starting off with an incredibly basic main menu, you’re given the option to either play through each level in order, or choose one at will (provided you’ve completed the level at least once). Once you load into the game’s first stage, you’ll immediately notice problems. As you move the camera around, the space around your ball disappears and reappears completely, flashing in and out of existence for several seconds at a time. It’s ludicrous, and makes lining up each shot a huge chore.
The level design itself is really no better. Unlike normal golf games, your goal isn’t a hole in the ground, but rather a literal golden goal post. The game frustratingly doesn’t give you much indication as to where the goal is located in each level, and with a few of the courses branching off into different directions, it’s often impossible to complete your task within the designated number of strokes, as you can waste a good four or five hits just trying to find the goal.
Taking each shot is a simple case of holding down the ‘ZR’ button until you reach your desired power level. The power gauge is located in the bottom right of the screen, but there’s no guide or marker to show where your shot might land. You have to completely rely on the direction the camera is facing and just sort of guess where the ball might end up. Needless to say, you’ll end up falling off the edge of the map a lot during Angry Golf (a point made even more frustrating when you consider that some of the holes don’t reset; you just keep falling and falling in perpetuity unless you manually restart).
Visually, there's little to no coherency or consistency. Environmental textures are sometimes present, although often not, so trees and buildings just look like blocks of solid colour. Other surfaces are also poorly implemented; one such level is located within a passageway made entirely of glass, but because the glass looks nothing like what you’d expect glass to look like, the developer actually includes the words ‘glass walls and ceiling’ within the level itself to clue you in. Better than nothing, we suppose.
It goes without saying at this point, but we can’t recommend you play this. It’s a frustrating experience right from the start, and there’s really no incentive to play through the game’s forty-odd stages beyond morbid curiosity. The visuals are unattractive, and taking each shot is a chore we wouldn’t wish upon anyone. Angry Golf is a bunker shot; best leave it there.
If you want us to avoid it you should have given it a fore.
No more comments pls, after that hole in one
That pub was bad enough that you deserve to get -club-bed.
haha bad game goes brr
Wow this is literally "my first Unity game", but actually released.
A double bogie this one
I don't know what ya'll are talking about, but.. oooo! Look at the birdie!
@Olliemar28 : Bounder? As in the perpetually happy bouncy ball in Commander Keen 4? But this one's got too many frowns in it!
EDIT: @Ooyah clarified below.
Decent idea, but the gameplay in the trailer looks weak & janky. Thanks for the review, NL<3
A little birdie told me that this ball's a stinker!
I am guessing that Ollie is referring to the absolute all time great that is Bounder on the C64! It really made me smile to see him referenced. I love that game! 😆
@Ooyah : Ah. Makes sense. Cheers.
Is it just me or are reviews for exceptionally bad games just flat more entertaining to read...?
You guys are so polite that when you say 3 I know that actually means 0. Haha!
NL reviews seem to consistently lack enough screenshots that help illustrate what they're talking about. Is there a technical issue that stops you from putting a screenshot or two after every paragraph?
Maybe I missed something, but I didn't see any screenshots that show the menu or the power meter.
Sound like a completely sub "par" game to me and the score of 3 is a "fairway" from being a "fore"
I will get my coat 😑
unbelievable that nintendo allows such a game on its platform. This game shouldn't even exist for mobile
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