Topic: Nintendo Corrupt-A-Wish

@Nicolai They pull off this innovation by going third party and putting the series on PlayStation.

I wish for a Pokémon game with all the regions.

Granted, but it is a puzzle game. Also, the locations don't really look at that much like the originals, and all the music is original.

I wish my cat could play video games with me.

Your cat can play them at least as well as your parents, but now you're trapped in a cat's body for the rest of your life.

They finally make sexy Pokémon but-not-like-that.

Granted. They're based on popular Nintendo characters, like Tingle and Wario, but with female forms. You will never be able to unsee them.

The Nintendo Switch exceeds the power of the PS4 Pro.

But only by harnessing cold fusion technology. Promptly, world governments uniformly confiscate all the Switches they can find to reverse-engineer the innovative technology. It becomes quite impossible to play on the go without go-ing... to a secret prison. Its library would have been lost to time, but the Switch still retains around as large of an instal base as the Wii U. Nintendo stops making games and starts making Deus Ex in real life.

Surprise! An indie game as revolutionary as Journey and as singular as Inside hits the Switch exclusively.

Your wish is granted, it's one of 4 games exclusive to the Nintendo Switch during the entirety of its run, and now the entire Nintendo community has to deal with the rapid influx of neo-beatnik hipsters who think walking simulators are the epitome of human artistic expression.

Also, you're invited to my funeral.

I wish the reindeers got some new Reindeer games to play with during the off-season, since we all know how stingy the North Pole's union can be.

@CanisWolfred Just FYI, Journey and Inside aren't walking simulators. For the record. They're barely even narrative games.

I don't care. Journey was still boring as hell, and the fact that its considered some sort of artistic genuis is emperor's-clothes levels of bull$%#!. Inside looks no better, more on the level of Limbo, whose attempts at creating a tense atmosphere just equated to a simplistic platformer where it's kind of difficult to see the platforms. Any "artistic merit" it might have certainly didn't make up for the fact it set its bar low on a mechanical level, and yet could barely get over said bar.

You can call them whatever you want, so long as that term isn't synonymous with "Game".

Yeesh.

I'll concede that Journey basically amounts to a trick on your emotions. But if something that beautiful is a trick, I'll happily be swindled again and again.

But, dude. @CanisWolfred. Don't talk ish about Inside. That game is maybe-GOTY in the year where Final Fantasy, The Last Guardian, both Dark Souls and Monster Hunter, as well as the entire still-living stealth genre came out. In fact, Inside absolutely demolishes XV's direction and pacing. And for the record, it's waaay above the level of Limbo. Especially progression-wise. Limbo starts out strong, then becomes a generic puzzle-platformer; but Inside starts out subtly, then builds and builds and builds through some amazing set pieces and puzzles.

Also, maybe a cheap ending like Journey's, but after those four to five hours you just played through? Masterful.

@Haru17 I'll admit that I haven't played Inside. I just don't trust it. Not after what I've seen, and certainly not after what I've experienced playing games that are either similar, or at least frequently mentioned in the same cheetoh-laidened breath whenever its praised.

And I'd say those GOTY comparisons were high praise, except I haven't played FFXV yet, The Last Guardian terrifies me, I hate Dark Souls (but in a more "I will concede that there's a good game in there, it's just that said game is covered in a thick layer of barbed wires & semen" kind of way), and Monster Hunter is the most lovingly crafted game and realized fantasy world I've ever played, that is only really great now that its creators have backed off enough from their original vision enough that people from the real world can actually enjoy it.

...I had no point with that last paragraph, I'm just really bored right now. And angry. But mostly bored.

...I wish Nintendo would make this boredom go away this Xmas season! Instead of having absolutely jack freakin' squat for the holiday season!!

Nintendo releases a BotW demo on the eshop which consists of the E3 demo with extras but data miners use that demo to leak the entire game and Nintendo Life reports thoroughly on the leaks until the January Switch presentation.

I wish Nintendo continues to use indie rock for Switch trailer music (like the Switch reveal trailer music is by White Denim).

Granted, but the song they use for the next Switch trailer is "My Pal Foot Foot" by The Shaggs (YouTube it, if you dare...).

I wish the Wii U had better support from EA games...

...with FIFA 14 and 15.

I wish Nintendo and Microsoft joined forces.

Okay, the Switch has been cancelled to focus on Xbox. Nintendo puts all of their resources into making the next Halo game.

I wish I wasn't so tired.

Don't worry. You could be more tired than you are right now, believe me.
I wish 4K TVs were free.... for me and me only.

They are. Nigerian people starve. You go to a non-specific Hell.

Nintendo starts to make adult-only games. They aren't creepy, but they are...

Pointless wastes of time, just like the every other adult-only game out there. Trust me on that...

I wish Nintendo would follow up their adult-only line-up with Nintendo-brand brain-bleach.

They do, but the bleach is the cheap kind; it only works on part of the frontal lobe. Therefore, your brain images are messed up and force you to imply things that may be even more disturbing than what you saw.

I wish Breath of the Wild would win GOTY in 2017.

Granted. The success goes to Nintendo's head, then they start to churn out low quality BotW sequels every year. They bomb in every review, and Nintendo comes to the conclusion that the Zelda franchise must obviously be dead, and Zelda joins the ranks among Metroid and F-Zero.

I wish every Nintendo Switch port and virtual console release will come with an upgrade discount of at least 50% for veteran fans.

@Nicolai (The funny part is, Breath is already 'The Legend of Zelda: Survive.')