We're still trying to get to the bottom of where Physical Contact: SPEED came from, as the game was supposed to launch today as part of the weekly Switch eShop download in Europe but it's currently (at the time of writing) listed with a release date of 'TBD' on the actual store; we've asked Nintendo for information. In the meantime we offer you the game's trailer above.
Those of you who are experiencing deja vu right now will be forgiven; the trailer calls to mind the very worst of Wii U shovelware, but this time, it's on the Switch.

Considering that Nintendo has been curiously strict about which games are allowed on the Switch eShop, this looks like an odd choice. Adorable little girls pretending to play on a Switch aside, the clip makes absolutely no attempt to hide the fact that it's just the Japanese trailer with a new intro - there's even Japanese text shown in the game. It doesn't leave a good impression.
After weeks of getting high-quality eShop releases it would seem that the floodgates have finally opened; whether or not we'll encounter a deluge of poor titles remains to be seen.
Comments 64
Surely Nintendo won't let them put this on the Switch? Today's NEO GEO review says they won't stop them.
Wow, that was a bad trailer. So should I recognize this card game?
Still I find it better than any game from THAT GUY (you know who I'm referring to by the caps lock)
Does it come w/ a Platinum trophy? (You'll either get that or you won't)
@SuperCharlie78 I wonder if he's still lurking around here, hahaha
"Considering that Nintendo has been curiously strict about which games are allowed on the Switch eShop, this looks like an odd choice."
I mean.... if anyone actually thinks that was anything more than just verbal garbage I dunno what to tell them.
I thought that the title of the game in combination with the picture on the front page was a bad combination. Gave me the creeps, in a disgusting way.
Off with the Head of the creator of that game !!
Worst trailer I've ever seen in my entire life
Sad that things like this get approved before Axiom Verge.
@SuperCharlie78 I don't, and I sure hope you're not talking about me.
I can't imagine that those kids would play a game like this, lol.
TBH it seems to be happening accross several platforms. That recent PSN release of a game billed as an easy Platinum Trophy.
Even though it was then removed.
I love that the game has barely any features so they just finish the trailer with the sound settings
10/10!
@Kimyonaakuma
LOL
Totally believable actresses. They represent the target demographic so well, and I could totally believe they were speaking the dialogue, and that the 2nd girl just got home from work, and was ready to play a boring card game to wind down for the night. 10/10, would produce a sitcom next.
LOL the part of the trailer where they showed the volume controls was amazing
MADIAX...... Is this you......?
I honestly don't think any stakeholder of a Nintendo fan site is the target audience for this game. Not for us. Move along.
"Physical contact : Speed" sounds like the kind of game I would invent late at a party to try and create promiscuity.
Simple functionality is one thing.
But visuals this dis-jointed, a completely non-sensical title, and a trailer this bewildering...
I was curious when I received the eshop update of the week so I looked up that exact same trailer...
Well, this is the same team behind the Mysterious Stars games. Which as you may know, are those Connect the Dots games on 3DS with broken English.
I used to play this game at school with real cards. Its surprising to see a video game of it as if you play it properly its quite a physical card game!
Major companies like Nintendo, Sony, and Microsoft need to put up restraints on what gets on the machine. Just because it's a "game" does make it a good video game. Oh well if it moves consoles then Nintendo is happy, right? Companies will always be companies.
Does this mean I might actually get to play Dress My Baby Pony Unicorn At The Mall ?
I almost can't believe that this isn't satire.
That looked more like a skit from Tim & Eric than a game trailer. Incredible!
From games webbpage
"If you play with your body in close contact, the match will be more fun."
Seriously will it.. Dosent that depend who you are close to & what they are wearing. As the game looks boring shovel ware as hell.
http://www.collavier.com/en/prj_vsspeed/index.html
overpriced by £4.49
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought the game with the witch riding the flying bicycle already opened the floodgates on Switch shovelwear...
Eh......it's a card game, if it functions well then why not.......there are times I like some solitaire and other card games on planes or road trips.
Still the game doesn't look like a good version of a "cards" game so I doubt I'm picking it up
I see that Nintendo's content curation strategy is working well.
Who needs trash like Axiom Verge when we could be playing this instead?
Day 1 purchase.
Speed if a fun card game in real life. My wife and I play it a lot. It can be a bit chaotic because you play at the same time instead of taking turns.
Unless this game is downloaded 1+ million times, no, it won't be heralding anything, let alone more shovelware.
@Exy I think he's talking about the RCMADIAX guy lol
@Zizzy Right? You know a game is lacking when they show off volume controls as a feature!
It looks like the developer shot this in his living room at home and edited it himself in iMovie. I understand being on a budget, but come on man...
This is annoying, considering the large list of proven indie developers who straight up said Nintendo told them 'No, not now'...
Physical Contact: SPEED
a.k.a. Sex: DRUGS (& Volume Controls)
It's impossible for all shovelware to be stopped. No sense griping about it, just leave it in the dumpster where it belongs so you can play the good stuff. Just my 2 cents...
"Here we go, again... again...!"
(Mario, Mario Vs. Donkey Kong, GBA)
@MeloMan Yeah, the games on the Switch eShop so far have been, by and large, quite good. But something will always slip through the cracks.
Y'know, Nintendo has a history of instituting policies aimed at cracking down on shovelware going back to the NES days. That's what their "Seal of Quality" was all about: to keep the type of trash that nearly sunk the Famicom from making it to the NES. Of course, just like now, some garbage still got through. (It was still not as bad as the situation in Japan, though.)
Day none!
GOTY
May look like shovelware, but it's Speed, a game I used to play all the time. If you like the game, it'll probably be a good buy.
@Ralizah
??
Axiom Verge is confirmed for Switch now. And getting a physical release.
@JaxonH I know it is, but that was up in the air for a while. My point is that, for a company that is ostensibly carefully curating the experiences available for the Switch in its first year, it's weird how some particularly bad games are getting approved.
Sometimes I think Nintendo will allow any game as long as it barely functions.
I found staring at a blank wall more exhilarating than this trailer
Okey dokey....
They might as well. The 3DS has been getting them quite sometime now.
I mean, the trailer's horrible, but what's wrong with $5 for what looks like a serviceable enough implementation of a card game? Vroom in the Night Sky is shovelware; this game makes sense.
Let's all judge a 5€ game by its trailer.
It doesn't look very good but what if gameplay is nice?
What inspired it?
The other 5€ Switch card game 'Shephy' looks better, and more interesting though.
The multiplayer reminds me of this from the Wii U reveal trailer. The same kind of multiplayer was in Wii Part U and Pure Chess. I think it suits the Switch.
"I am home !" wtf? That's one of the worst/weirdest video game trailers I've ever seen.
What is the target demographic for this game? 3 year Olds who have busy work schedules and don't know how to speak yet? THEYRE JUST MASHING BUTTONS TOO! THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THEY ARE DOING!
Bulboy was also meant to be today and got moved to TBD
So much new stuff on the coming soon though!
@rjejr Oh God haha, least we won't have to worry about that kind of crap coming to the switch.
I really hope that doesnt become a trend on Sony platforms. Made a great Jim Sterling video though!
Fantastic trailer! Trolololol!
First I wanted to write something along the lines of "Look, the more games and users the better. If someone buys a Switch to play this one, the user base grows, which is good for Nintendo and other publishers. Later they will probably buy other games."
And then I watched that trailer.
Looks like Zelda and Mario Odyssey have got some tough competition for GOTY
I wonder if this was delayed to avoid competition with Shephy?
What the ? How did this slip the net ? Somehow how vroom in the night sky also slipped the net as well this looks dire
Holy Moses. This is why rather than outright banning these greenlight-ish games, we just need a separate tab for them. The eshop can be for first party titles and interesting indie hits, and if you whip up some working poker game in game maker and want to force it on the world, you can have it appear in an eshop subcategory. Kind of like the PSP mobile games.
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