Topic: Open invitation for someone to come punch me in the face.

This is a rant thread. Open for anyone with technology-related rants to come rant their hearts out.
But, okay, my experience: it's been windy as hell here for about 2 days, and being the total prophet that I am, I friggin called it that the power would go out today. And it did. Then I get home and my wife has booted up the comp.... and we're stuck in some obscure 4:3 ratio that my native 1440x900 monitor doesn't display properly. My awesomely adorable picture of me and my daughter out on May 17th (Norway's national day) that's set as my wallpaper is stretched and we both have square heads. Text is stretched. Eyes are strained.
At this point, note that I'm a technogeek with a manly man's physique. One time I busted a virus in 10 minutes that the "pros" at the aptly-named "Expert" electronics store couldn't nail. I get at least 4 tech questions a week from annoying friends who're happy to save a small fortune by asking for my help instead of taking their rusty XP machines into repair shops. In other words, I know what I'm doing.... in general.
So, I go in to change the resolution back and my resolution's not even on the list. It goes from 1300 vertical to 1600 vertical (can't remember the horizontal pixels right off), and I have no friggin clue as to what's going on. I use Nvidia's custom resolution maker, but that just gives me a super-letterbox format, and my monitor doesn't have scaling. So I do a factory reset on it, in the process losing an hour's worth of work on gamma correction and color tweaking (the wife does photo editing). No avail. Brutal.
So, I download and install Powerstrip. Same thing. Make a custom driver for my monitor and everything.
I google the problem. Get suggestions for everything I've already done. Then I get the bright idea of hooking up my old monitor and maybe hooking up my new one as a secondary and see if that solves the problem. Go look in the basement for 20 minutes (as my baby monitor spews static at me, irritating me further), haul it back up, then I find out that they use different power cables, and I (of course) have no idea as to where the old one is.
2 hours in and I finally decide to just switch the monitor from port 1 to port 2 on my GTS 250. Of course it doesn't register in port 2. No idea why. So, I plug it into port 1 again. And I have my 1440x900 resolution back.
That's where the face punching comes in. I don't think I can hit myself hard enough to kill enough brain cells to make myself not feel stupid after that one.
There you go. Share your stupid tech stories. Everybody's got one. I've got at least 2 more, but I should really get busy readjusting my color and gamma :@

I read the title. I'm a boxer. And I would like to punch you in the face.

I'm a boxer, too, Emil
Wanna set up a match?

Finally another boxer. I live in Iowa and there are no boxers around here. A match would be epic! lol

YAY FOR IOWA!

You from Iowa too?

Can I kick?

Haha, I live in Norway, so should we meet in the middle to halve transport costs? Somewhere out in the Atlantic

EDIT: And technically, I'm a kickboxer, but I use my hands more
Kept the kickboxing stance, though

I've got a mean left hook. It can stop a train at fifty paces.
If you post me your face I can do the honours.
Techno rant: The internet is really slow today. It took a whole TEN seconds for Google to load. Ridiculous.

.....I thought this was a rant thread...

Thats cool man I didnt start at boxing. I did Ba Ji Quan to work on my lower body. And Pi Gua Quan to work on my center of gravity and axis. I use the Baji stance though.

COME AT ME BRO

I want to punch everyone that I work with today.

That is all.

What is this "Iowa" you speak of?

Booooooo!

This thread title is misleading! D:< It sounds all cool and then Boom! whiny wall of text. =( Wtf, man?

It's like if someone made a thread called "Zoobles Fan Club" and you are all "Yeah Zoobles! I love dem Zoobles!" Then you open it up and it's just a thesis about prohibition eventually lead to the stock market crash and the great depression focusing mostly around the laws and stautes of the era. You are like, "Wtf bro? Where my Zooble at? Dis just be the prohibition legal jargon. I sad panda now. I go rub toothpaste on my face now and feel good" u_u That's what you did! That's what kind of person you want to be!?

Ugh, I wanna punch you in the kneecap so bad! D:<

This man- no, this deity has a point!

So where do I line up to punch people?

My tech rant:
Actually, both me and my hubby are sort of subtly battling for the title of "techy" in our house. His attitude is something like "I've got a built in knowledge base that makes me automatically know how to fix anything". And my attitude is "Go right ahead sweetie, I'll be in the kitchen making dinner if, actually, WHEN you need me to come fix whatever mess you've made worse." We each win some, lose some, etc.
However, we recently purchased a new home theatre system, complete with Bose speakers and Pioneer receiver, and decide to set it up "together". I grab the manual, he starts plugging wires wherever. The tension begins to mound, as I constantly point to the pictures and he points to cables. Finally, we reach boiling point when we switch the tv on to configure the system, and "No Device Detected". Obviously, he connected something to the wrong something. Obviously, I must have skipped a step while reading the instructions. Accusations are flying. We follow the cords from each speaker, each source, and check all connections. Nothing. After a trip to the store, $100 worth of new cables, and hours of pushing random buttons, we admit defeat. Calling customer service is always our last resort, but we're exhausted, and I want to watch LOTR in surround sound!!
A friendly customer service rep, Jeff, seems to sense our frustrations and very casually asks "ok, once you've selected the right input, what does it say?" "NO DEVICE DETECTED!!!" "Ok, now the next step in the manual says to push SETUP, have you done that?" "........................................." "Sir? Ma'am? Are you still there?" ".................yes..............." "Have you pushed SETUP?" "...............now we have.................." "Ok, great! Is it working?" "..........................yes......................." "Alrighty, have a great day!" "Thanks, Jeff".
So in my defence, I had read that step, but since it was saying 'no device detected' I thought 'why would you push setup if its not even detecting the device'. AND, my husband couldn't even find the button on the remote that said SETUP, so... ya. We watched our LOTR with beautiful surround sound in icy silence.

Oh moogles are so cute when they throw their little tantrums.