@NintendoByNature Well, that's another battle won, then. Most important tip I could give you is to not focus too much on being able to work with nice people, but on options, opportunities and professionalism and/or team spirit (aka what's in it for you, especially in the long run). I've worked with plenty of, shall we say "less courteous" people in my day, as a sales & marketing team manager, and ultimately, the kind people that I came across were a nice diversion, but most of them were either too soft for the job, or were trying to hard to be liked by everyone, which actually affected both their and other people's work ethos.
I rather have a colleague that's tough as nails and knows what to do, when to do it and within the expected time frame, all while not being overly social or likeable, than someone that is very likeable and has either less or nearly none of these qualities.
But as mentioned earlier, what your possibilities are within that company, that's what's most important, so if there's still an opportunity or some wiggle room in the negotiations to find out the following, then be sure to do so (if you haven't done it already):
Are you basically always going to stay the same cog in the machine, with the occasional pay raise, or are there also multiple opportunities/paths for personal growth? And don't accept any empty promises either. A lot of companies that are eager to real someone in, for whatever reason(s) on their part, will often times be all too quick to reply any questions pertaining to these things with a "yes, of course" or "yes, absolutely" and worst of all: the double yes.
The latter is a rather nervous and ambiguous one. For simplicity's sake, let's just say that two yes'es cancel each other out, meaning that either the answer is up in the air and they can't really tell you (yet), or there simply isn't any opportunity for growth to speak off, and they just want to keep that from you until they've cemented their contract with you, and you're unable to leave for the next couple of years...
On a side note: perhaps needless to say, but be sure to do or say any of that in your own words, otherwise it'll come across as decidedly alien/not you, or from someone who's reading from an auto-cue...
@Ryu_Niiyama Sure, in a Utopian, idealistic world, we can expect all people to always be and/or try to become the best person they can be, but that simply isn't a realistic view, unfortunately. But I would never, and I do mean NEVER let that faze me or make me loathe getting out of bed in the morning. I can't control other people or what they do, I'm only in control of myself and what I do, and/or over the parts of my life that I can personally have any actual influence in.
So, we're indeed only responsible for and can only take care of what we ourselves do and say, which is basically what I was also getting at in my previous comment. If someone neglects to do something, or does something bad, I can curse and swear, verbally or physically attack that person, or berate him/her in hopes of making them see the error of their ways, or I can simply maneuver around the problem, and leave it up to them, without spending my own precious energy by investing (too much of) my time on it.
Oh, and I meant the high standards thing in the most positive way: I too believe in being the best me I can be, so we very much agree on that part, but on the other hand, I don't believe in perfection, or at least not as in someone or something being a 100% or more of something or at something. Sure, people get straight A's at certain disciplines, but that's only every so often, and only in one or a small handful of disciplines. To be human, is to be inherently flawed, and in quite a few ways. And that's nothing to be annoyed about, it's just the way it is. And I also don't think that it's worth being annoyed with the rest of humanity over, although every so often, I do wish that the asteroid would come and hit us, sooner than later, but that's only on a bad day, and shows that even I am just (an ever so slightly flawed) human...
But besides that, and I don't know if that's specifically a martial arts thing or not, although I like to think it's just me as a person, I also strife for awareness, mindfulness, honesty, good manners and respect. Although in my view, the latter should not be given freely: it has to be deserved, either by experience, reputation/station or deeds/achievements.
On a side note: so, you're simply expecting to walk into restaurants to pick up your free milkshake, huh?
@ThanosReXXX Utopias are built. Ideals are potential that humanity has not realized yet. But the work still needs to be done. You and I tend to speak at opposing angles most of the time so I'll not turn this into a text wall.
Well I'm sure the milkshake will require some other purchase but I can buy a small fry if that nets me a milkshake. Free food is free food.
Taiko is good for the soul, Hoisa!
Japanese NNID:RyuNiiyamajp
Team Cupcake! 11/15/14
Team Spree! 4/17/19
I'm a Dream Fighter. Perfume is Love, Perfume is Life.
3DS Friend Code: 3737-9849-8413 | Nintendo Network ID: RyuNiiyama
@Ryu_Niiyama Well, I don't feel like we're all that opposite, because I agree with a lot of what you say. I just tend to be a bit more lenient towards people and factors that I can't have any control over, and I don't want to spend my own precious time and energy worrying about that, or getting annoyed or even angry about it, because it really serves no purpose, other than having various detrimental effects to my own life.
That's basically all that I was trying to get across in the previous two text walls. Maybe I even feel like you're either a little too hard on yourself, and/or for the rest of humanity. And I'm really sorry, but even though any kind of Utopia is a nice idea, looking at how the world works and fares, it simply isn't achievable by any imaginable means, at least not within any of our lifetimes. And I'm not about to go to work for someone else's lifetime. In that respect, I may have my own flaw of being a bit too selfish.
I'll do my damnedest to be the best me I can be, as you do, but I'm not going to help, instruct or berate anyone else on how to do the same: it's all up to them, and I take neither the blame nor the pain for it.
I got to try my first-ever VR experience with a modified HTC Vive yesterday evening. It was a fun (though mildly disorienting) experience. I got to walk on a plank at the top of a highrise (with a real plank provided to walk on IRL) just to grab a few donuts. XD
Unfortunately my health went downhill shortly after the presentation that included that experience ended, so I went straight home (driving is horrible at night when your eyes are sensitive to light), did some things around home that needed to be done, and turned in early before my bad headache became an all-out migraine. It had been percolating on and off all day, and it didn't help that some of the facility was quite dry; my eyes are still pretty susceptible to dryness at this stage post-surgery, and stupid me thought I wouldn't be there long enough to need eye drops until I got home.
I don't understand the current opinion that being crass is more realistic/honest/natural, if your natural personality is to insult and belittle others and hide behind "it's my sense of humor, don't judge me" or curse at work, I really want nothing to do with you. (I mean you wouldn't say those things to our investors usually ...I know that the suits are usually the worst behind closed doors.)
THANK YOU! I was raised to treat others how I'd like to be treated in kind. Thankfully in my case, my team of (mostly) guys is small enough and sensible enough to not be too crass. There's a bit of swearing sometimes, but as long as it isn't near The Hangover levels, I can deal. There's some good-natured heckling sometimes, but nothing that I'd ever call bullying. Tbh I my experiences, I'd rather work with mostly guys over females any day.
One of the sales guys that we share our space with is a bit of a chauvinist, but thankfully he's not in often and has mellowed out a bit over time.
@NintendoByNature Sounds promising! Don't rush into your decision, particularly if you have any misgivings.
I do agree that guy sounds pretty unprofessional, particularly in a formal-sounding interview environment. I'm normally a benefit of the doubt person as I don't know what someone is going through at any given time, but that would've come off as rude to me as well.
In any case, congrats on scoring an offer!
Currently playing: Layton's Mystery Journey: Katrielle and the Millionaires' Conspiracy (Switch)
@Tyranexx I hope you are feeling better. I know full well the ordeal of driving when photosensitive.
My current job is the closest I've been to working with more women (my boss, VP and the senior BAs are all female) but the infrastructure team and my loudmouth coworker are men. I'm sure working with women has its own issues (and since I'm not hetero I'm sure I'll have to deal with hearing about men all day, the same way I have to hear about women in an skeevy way from my male coworkers) but I'd like to try it just once. I will say I'm happy that many of the programming/SQL mentors I have found out here are female. Gives me hope for the future...I'm still the lone African American though in work and all of my hobbies lol...but I'm used to that. Of course it's not really that we don't do that kind of work, I just tend to end up in cities where I'm seriously the minority.
However, manners are a dying thing and we live in a world that doesn't care about that happening (but whines about PC every 5 seconds. If your first response isn't to say something rude or demeaning you don't have to worry about somebody wanting to be treated with respect...I mean large air quotes "policing your free speech and getting triggered". People exhaust me.) so I suppose I'll clutch to my "traditional" views until I shuffle off the mortal coil.
Edit: Ok I have to stop posting and closing tickets at the same time. Word salad.
Taiko is good for the soul, Hoisa!
Japanese NNID:RyuNiiyamajp
Team Cupcake! 11/15/14
Team Spree! 4/17/19
I'm a Dream Fighter. Perfume is Love, Perfume is Life.
3DS Friend Code: 3737-9849-8413 | Nintendo Network ID: RyuNiiyama
@Ryu_Niiyama I’m the only male in exec/administration except for the two IT dept employees. I can think of less than ten other males of our 500 employees.
It doesn’t matter what bits people have, sucky people suck 😂
Also, I’m sure McD’s would have free milkshakes....if their machines worked badum pshhh
#MudStrongs
Switch Friend Code: SW-7842-2075-5515 | My Nintendo: HobbitGamr | Nintendo Network ID: HobbitGamr
@HobbitGamer While that is true. What bits you have change how you are socialized. And thus the conversations that you have. Common ground is common ground. Plus sometimes I get tired of the testosterone fest. I doubt I'll end up in an all female team until I'm much older as STEM keeps making a push for for the mindshare of girls and women. I'll be in research by then and mostly a hermit anyway.
Taiko is good for the soul, Hoisa!
Japanese NNID:RyuNiiyamajp
Team Cupcake! 11/15/14
Team Spree! 4/17/19
I'm a Dream Fighter. Perfume is Love, Perfume is Life.
3DS Friend Code: 3737-9849-8413 | Nintendo Network ID: RyuNiiyama
@HobbitGamer That milkshake thing is accurate though - back before I swore off McDonald's when I was in university my roommate and I must have gone to the local one 5 times in a row only to find their machines broken. lol
Nintendo Switch FC: 4867-2891-2493
Switch username: Em
Discord: Heavyarms55#1475
Pokemon Go FC: 3838 2595 7596
PSN: Heavyarms55zx
@Ryu_Niiyama Oh, I agree with that. Different strokes for potatoes and all that.
The general thing is, as you said, everyone knows how to be pleasant and they should do it more. It’s far more effort to get worked up about things, too. Even if I dislike someone, I show them a baseline respect everyone gets. We’re all in this together 😂
Southern raised here
#MudStrongs
Switch Friend Code: SW-7842-2075-5515 | My Nintendo: HobbitGamr | Nintendo Network ID: HobbitGamr
Taiko is good for the soul, Hoisa!
Japanese NNID:RyuNiiyamajp
Team Cupcake! 11/15/14
Team Spree! 4/17/19
I'm a Dream Fighter. Perfume is Love, Perfume is Life.
3DS Friend Code: 3737-9849-8413 | Nintendo Network ID: RyuNiiyama
@Ryu_Niiyama Cool, I lived in Winston for a spell when I was little. Most of mom’s side lives between there and Bastion WV.
I’ve never really been a milkshake fan, too much milk at once bothers me. But I’ve enjoyed Arby’s’.
#MudStrongs
Switch Friend Code: SW-7842-2075-5515 | My Nintendo: HobbitGamr | Nintendo Network ID: HobbitGamr
Inconsiderate people and workplace jerks don’t come in sexes, races, or creeds. They just are. We’ve all been jerks, and we’ve all been inconsiderate. Some people make a habit out of it. My business partner is a woman, and we’re a perfect combo for our business and when we need help (time off) in our personal lives. Nothing is weird. It’s just honest conversation, recognition of our strengths and weaknesses, and respect.
Some haunted place are looking for a big male to play Jason, if I do get the part, that'll be a perfect excuse to get a new phone (my current one can hardly contain Pokemon GO updates. Also, the friend who is a girl still never hatched a Riolu to evolve into a Lucario to name it after me : ( )
I have plenty of experience playing as Jason in the Friday the 13th game, I love to party with the other camp counselors as we run around in circles, hopefully it's the same Jason role.
Also for any OGs, YEEah, I also played the NES one, so hopefully I can rev up the purple and blue version if I rev up the role.
I made Sheldon & Mr. Randoms back on Flipnote Hatena, now i'm a kangaroo mod that has a funko pop collection!
I'm not keen politics since that stuff is spooky, I'd rather watch SpongeBob over Fox News anyways!
This is my last year on my current job, so I am considering just showing up to work on Halloween wearing full Imperial Storm Trooper armor and acting like nothing out of the ordinary is going on.
Nintendo Switch FC: 4867-2891-2493
Switch username: Em
Discord: Heavyarms55#1475
Pokemon Go FC: 3838 2595 7596
PSN: Heavyarms55zx
This is my last year on my current job, so I am considering just showing up to work on Halloween wearing full Imperial Storm Trooper armor and acting like nothing out of the ordinary is going on.
Until you trip and they hear the sound of plastic scrapping against the floor. Like a true storm trooper.
@StableInvadeel At least there are no blast doors for me to bump my head on. And I don't need to worry about missing every shot because my blaster will be fake. :3
Nintendo Switch FC: 4867-2891-2493
Switch username: Em
Discord: Heavyarms55#1475
Pokemon Go FC: 3838 2595 7596
PSN: Heavyarms55zx
@Ryu_Niiyama For what it's worth, and perhaps unnecessary to say, but I never mean to offend or annoy (and on the off chance that I do, it's so blatantly obvious and a LOT more hostile), but I guess that as a highly empathic individual, I often tend to react more intensely to other people's pain, annoyances and/or other emotions. And I wouldn't make the effort or put in the energy to dedicate that much text to a person that I didn't like or respect, so that should also tell you something, even if some of my words could potentially come across as harsh or insensitive.
But again: no offense meant, though. So, here's to being the best you. Peace.
(I also hope you can keep all of this in mind, the next time we might happen to exchange text walls)
@Tyranexx Are we talking night blindness here? If so, a lady friend of mine uses a pair of yellow-tinted glasses for that. Doesn't take away the problem entirely, but it alleviates it to some extent.
@Heavyarms55 You could always get a NERF blaster...
'The console wars are like boobs: Sony and Microsoft fight over which ones look the nicest and Nintendo's are the most fun to play with.'
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