Topic: I got kind of a what would you do scenario for you all.

I was leaving the grocery store the other day when a strange young girl probably 20 something started calling out to me saying scuse me sir! I stopped to see what she wanted and she asked if i could give her 5 bucks to buy some food. Anyway being the generous guy i am i thought for a moment and started reaching in my pockets to see if i had a couple dollars. I was about to give it to her when a female employee begins chasing after her and yelled at me not to give her any money and started talking to someone on a radio that there was someone out in the parking lot begging customers for money. I was kinda freaked out by this so i just said sorry i don't have any cash and left.
The young girl started crying and ran off.

The rest of the day i couldn't stop thinking about that poor kid. It could have been a scam but if she really was starving i hope she found some help.

@Zeldafan79 I was I many scenarios like that. Sometimes you help sometimes you outright refuse.

I feel guilty (and I don't know why!) for about 5-6 hours and then it is ok.

Remember there will always be people in trouble (poor, starving, drug addicts, sick) in this world. You can't help them all. And some of them do not even deserve help but we realise that when it is too late.

Just help when you feel it otherwise do not even bother

There was an incident in front of my dads house a couple years back that did turn out to be a scam. This couple, a man and woman with a small girl knocked on the door and claimed they were selling cookies. They were showing my dad this catalog with prices and even pictures of the cookies. they had him fill out some piece of paper supposedly confirming the order. The whole thing looked pretty legit. They even took his phone number and said they didn't have the cookies right now but they'd have them delivered but they needed the money up front. So we waited and after a couple weeks we figured what had happened. We got hosed.

Long story short we never saw the cookies or the people who ripped us off. Luckily my dad only blew 20 bucks but still. Using your kid to scam somebody like that? What a rotten thing to do!

@Zeldafan79 Yes it is called being a human unfortunately. Sometimes we do not deserve help or sympathy.

@Zeldafan79 This is the kind of lose lose scenario where I think you can end up feeling like both options are possibly the wrong answer. I don't know for sure what I would do...

If you're gonna give money to poor people, it's best to do it through some kind of charity where you can check how the money is being spent.

There's a difference between actually doing good and just making yourself feel good.

I wouldn't give anyone any money. If she genuinely needs to beg for money for food then she needs help beyond a few bucks to get her through the next 12 hours.

Hmm....This is a toughie. Plenty of people out there truly are experiencing difficult circumstances and need a helping hand. Conversely, some people intentionally abuse the kindness of strangers and scam them or worse.

Personally, I wouldn't have given her money; I don't donate money unless it's directly to a legit charity or organization and/or I know exactly what it's going towards. If possible, I frequently try to donate food and other goods instead. In this case (if she hadn't been driven off), I would have probably grabbed her a bite to eat somewhere if possible. Never alone with this person as one doesn't know their intentions, but always in the sight of other people. Or offered to grab some food for her out of the store on my dime.

I had another situation come up once not with being asked for money but being asked for a ride to the hospital. I flat said no to that one! For one I'm not letting a stranger in my car and secondly if you need a ride to the hospital call an ambulance. I suppose if it was a harmless looking little old lady i might have risked it. Still it's a scary world out there. you gotta be careful and watch your back.

I've actually been offered rides before while walking somewhere and a couple times i took them but it still felt strange that someone trusted me enough to be in their own vehicle not having a clue who i was.

i remember being in a situation... well I wasn't my Dad was (I was a kid)... at the DMV going to leave. A lady came up and was crying asking for a ride to a random place we didnt know saying someone was tryna kill her, saying shes been abused pointing to her eye (was bruised). he said he couldnt help cus i (like.. 8 or 9 at the time) was with him but i always thought about that lady hoping shes okay, whether she legitimately needed help or if my dad did the right thing.
sadly ive seen too deeply the sides of both.

to the point though... i remember my grandpa telling me once, if you give money/anything you have to give away ownership of whats done with it; its only right - they know what they need best in that moment even if its wrong overall. i always thought it was kind of a blind faith thing, but i get it as ive grown older. i always hate those situations cus you're put on the spot but i always go by my grandpa's advice in the end now. i read whatever signs i can if its a good idea or not and then let it go with whatever they might do with it.

Sometimes they just want it for drugs, sometimes they want it for the guy that kidnapped them or their abusive parents, sometimes they want to know where the money is so they can mug you later, sometimes they do want food.

Most of the time however it is better not to give them anything.

I wouldn't give them any money. I don't know what it's like in the U.S. but in London there is a "homeless" racket where they line them up in key spots (where the bankers walk by) and have them beg. The money goes to a pimp with the "homeless" agent getting a cut.

I've seen one woman in the city with a gammy leg and a pair of crutches. I looked closely at her leg and she just didn't have her shoe on properly. The next week I saw the same woman walking rather quickly in the westend with her crutches stuffed in (but hanging out the top of) her back pack.

I doubt this is part of that particular racket but one woman has been begging on the train for money to get to a hospital for an open wound on her leg. She has literally been doing it for a year at least. (This is how long I've seen her do it.) She may not be being pimped but she is definitely keeping this wound open to elicit money from people riding the train. I'd say it's a shame because it will probably get infected and she will lose the leg but I reckon she will just use that as a tool to get more money.

Only five? I had a kid asking me for a hundred so his dad could get bread and milk...

Yeah, nah.

@ralphdibny
I was in Melbourne last year, a lot of the beggars were better dressed than I was

@shaneoh certainly in London, I imagine they earn more than I do in a day