User Profile




Male, 26, Kazakhstan

300 characters or less? George R. R. Martin didn't settle for that stuff, and neither will I! Consequently, the rest of this section will consist of the words "THE HEROES THE HEROES THE HEROES AND VILLAINS" spammed continuously until the cap is reached. Wait, I ran out of space already? CURSE YOU...

Wed 4th December, 2013

Recent Comments



Solid_Stannis commented on Short Bursts Of Tetris Can Help To Control Cer...:

Speaking of the Tetris effect... Whenever I've played an online game with any sort of chat function, I see obnoxious 10 year olds questioning people's race and sexuality everywhere when I'm out for a walk, just like in the game. What's worse, they appear all the time recently, regardless of whether I've been gaming or not!



Solid_Stannis commented on Talking Point: Assessing the Odds of Super Mar...:

The Wii U's already a write-off. Not even a 2015 release of the new Zelda would've much altered its hardware sales. But it's certainly not because it's a bad console. It's the times, man.

Anyway, SMM should by all rights be a good seller for the current install base, though.



Solid_Stannis commented on Nintendo Still Hasn't Decided Which Zelda Time...:

I don't care about the timeline, and apparently neither does Nintendo, having basically hired fanfiction writers to cobble something halfway coherent (albeit chock full of logical fallacies) from something whose connections were written terribly at best.



Solid_Stannis commented on Interview: Senran Kagura Producer Kenichirō T...:

well, like the product or no, at least the guy is true to himself and doesn't cave in to the political correctness crowd. Good for him. Be nice if he directed his efforts towards something that might help people's perception of video games--or, hey, Japanese culture altogether--rather than the other way around, but that's the way it goes.



Solid_Stannis commented on Weirdness: Revenge is a Dish Best Sold on eBay...:

She'll feel bad about it, in time, if she truly has a heart. Can't blame someone for making rash, spiteful decisions in such a situation, especially when we don't know the full story. Not that we should be acting like the moral superiority police in the first place...



Solid_Stannis commented on Nintendo President Satoru Iwata Passes Away Ag...:

I'm speechless. For all my misgivings about him as president, he was an exceedingly likeable man, and his obvious passion for the beautiful art form that is video gaming is nothing short of inspirational. we shall not see his like again, and video games--no, art in all its forms--will be lesser without him.

Rest in peace, Satoru Iwata. If you want to truly honor his memory, take some time off from whatever you're doing and just sit down and play his games, like the child you once were. It's hard to ask for a more fulfilling legacy.



Solid_Stannis commented on Review: Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards (Wii U eS...:

Until artificial intelligence is invented (and even then we'll only be able to enjoy it for three days or so until it comes to the conclusion that humanity is obsolete and kills us all) there can be no such thing as a "site's opinion." Reviews are written by people, and people are different. This is exactly why it's silly to base a game purchase decision on the opinions of the few.



Solid_Stannis commented on Video: Brace Yourself for these Top Five Most ...:

Nothing gets me excited and ready for adventure like the original Kingdom Hearts.. Or to a lesser extent KH3D since it uses the same music (shame about the game itself, though...)

I'm also fond of Majora's Mask's spine-tingling muted horror, Final Fantasy X's understated in medias res piano ennui, and Skyward Sword, if mostly because of the music.



Solid_Stannis commented on Video: This News Anchor Sure Is Excited About ...:

So many cynics... the dude had a picture of his NES hooked up, it's hard to get more legit than that. Sure, he seems a bit, err, much, but his inherent awkwardness is no doubt exacerbated by genuine excitement.

Not taking everything you see and hear at face value is a healthy outlook, but it's wasted on innocuous things such as this.



Solid_Stannis commented on Video: Watch a Super Mario 30th Anniversary Mu...:

"Shoreditch" sounds like where they'd unceremoniously dump syphilis-addled corpses back in the 1800s. Trendy then and now, I guess.

Lookin' nifty though, wonder how long it'll take before some 'hilarious' chavs decide to ruin it with unimaginary words and anatomically unsound renditions of parts of the human anatomy.



Solid_Stannis commented on Weirdness: Twitch Plays Metal Gear Solid: Ghos...:

Now there's a game that'd look swell on my N3DS. If nothing else, Kojima's departure might spur Konami on to release what they can of archive titles on contemporary consoles. Let some minute good come from this...

I'll wait with the whole "watching someone else play video games" masochistic insanity thing until my own hands are chopped off by a Sith Lord or something.



Solid_Stannis commented on Video: Disney Magical World 2 Looks as Charmin...:

It's a bit of a shame that they milk it to the degree they do... some people will just be put off by Frozen's overexposure and dismiss watching it altogether. It's a pretty fine movie on its own merits... Not worthy of the hype, obviously (nothing deserves this level of pop-cultural omniscience), but still one of the best animated films of the decade for sure. Don't get blinded by hype.



Solid_Stannis commented on Review: The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time (...:

Ocarina's a fine game and deserves all the praise it gets for being a pioneering trailblazer, but judged on its own merits there is scant little to enjoy that hasn't since been done better, both inside its own series and out.

Even considering that nothing should ever be conferred such a lofty title, a man can do little but cringe at these incomprehensible proclamations of "best game ever." This denotes only a lack of historical gaming knowledge, or a surplus of deep-set nostalgia, or both.

Or, err, subjective opinions I guess.



Solid_Stannis commented on Reggie Fils-Aime Attempts To Explain Why Zelda...:

Can anyone just tell me... has Fils-Aime actually ever done anything to positively benefit Nintendo aside from being a middlingly gregarious spokesperson and unwitting instigator of the very dankest of memes? Oh, and explaining things away with generic corporation rhetoric, I guess.



Solid_Stannis commented on Nintendo Is A Slave To Its Past Success, Says...:

Straight talk. I am nothing less than amazed at how woefully out-of-touch Nintendo have shown themselves to be at their worst moments for almost a decade now. This latest E3 snafu should've been a surprise only to the most ardent of fanboys... and chances are, even that contingent will realize how they messed up long before Nintendo brass ever does.

Mostly, I think Nintendo are just a tiny bit afraid of anyone bursting the bubble in which they find themselves. Sure, it allows for a continuance of superlative game experiences with that unique, timeless Nintendo touch, but it also locks them into the same mindset they had when they ruled the market back in the '90s. The wii's success was the last thing Nintendo needed to deal with their perpetual egotrip; they don't even understand why it became the success that it was. They just had the luck of unleashing the right gimmick at the right time.

For better or worse, the wants of gamers have changed dramatically, whereas Nintendo are pretty much exactly where they were in the mid-'90s, only without the commercial success to show for it. Nintendo deserves better than close-minded old men who think they can still party like it's 1993.



Solid_Stannis commented on Rare Replay on Xbox One Will Include 30 Games,...:

And this marks the first time Microsoft has ever done anything to attract my attention. And rather tellingly, my reaction still doesn't amount to a whole lot more than a shrug of disbelief pertaining as to how much of a waste this is on a console that doesn't justify its own existence.



Solid_Stannis commented on Final Fantasy Wasn't Named For The Reason You ...:

It's not too late to render the old misconception half-true and really make the final entry in the series, you know. watching it linger on like a vegetable on life-support like this still hurts over ten years since I renounced any future interest in the series.



Solid_Stannis commented on Poll: Did The Splatoon Global Testfire Hit Its...:

I thoroughly enjoyed it. The only really big issue I have is with the seeming randomness of the map selection. During the last testfire window, I only got to play the warehouse level, which is approximately fifteen point eight times better than the alternative, once. During the first session, the alternation was at a comparatively healthy, agreeable level.



Solid_Stannis commented on Talking Point: Is Konami About To Exit The Con...:

I say let 'em, before they inevitably ruin Metal Gear without the aid of Kojima's guiding hand. They literally release nothing else of value these days.

...Of course, this doesn't eliminate the possibility of whomever picks up the IP to ruin it, but at least it won't be by its procreator's hand. Sins of the Father...



Solid_Stannis commented on Mother 3:

You can't spell MOTHER 3 without E and 3. Make it happen this year 'tendo.



Solid_Stannis commented on ​Warren Spector Reminisces About the Develop...:

Epic Mickey is one of my biggest personal letdowns of all time. And I've played Final Fantasy XII here, guys! That right there shoul tell you something! Awesome idea on paper; horrible execution that killed my interest within an hour.



Solid_Stannis commented on Ninterview: Jeremy Parish On Cataloguing The H...:

Eh, don't be so glum mister archivist person. Chances are that one person in the project's inevitable cult following of less than a thousand people will take it upon themselves to complete your mission without permission and a serious quality dip in informativeness and presentation. Because that's what's happened with every unfinished thing ever.



Solid_Stannis commented on Digital Foundry Assesses The Legend of Zelda: ...:

Twin Snakes and Twilight Princess HD is all I need.

Sunshine needs a heck of a lot more than a fresh coat of paint to avoid my growing tired of it some 30 Shines in, which always happens when I feel charitable enough to give it another try. A better 100% completion reward than "Have a relaxing vacation, you're gonna need it after wasting hours of your life" would be a start.