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United States

Tue 27th Oct 2009

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Advancedcaveman commented on Peter Molyneux: If I were Nintendo, I'd Put Ma...:

If I where in charge of Nintendo I would do this just to shut people up. Make some janky endless runner with mario sprites, charge 5 dollars for it, and load it up with microtransactions. If anyone complains, just say "This is what's popular on the ipad and you people kept telling us to do it."

Just have an intern cobble it together in an afternoon, and put the profits into a pub fund style thing to support independent developers who are trying to make high quality, full featured platformers for the eShop.



Advancedcaveman commented on Feature: Ten Smartphone and Tablet Games We'd ...:

None of these are any good other than monkey island (and why is this being thrown in with mobile games? Its a remake of a PC game that's been ported to other platforms). Shadowgun is a pile of trash; its a generic, weedy clone of all the crappy cover hugging shooters they make nowadays and the rest of these are just like web browser games I remember playing 10 years ago.

Rune Radiers is one of the only native phone games I can think of off the top of my head that's really worth playing or being ported to a console. Maybe Horn, Lili & Mage Gauntlet if they where completely re-made to be less shallow and more controller oriented. Maybe Spider: The Secret of Bryce Mannor, but again they'd have to completely re-make it and turn it into some kind of actual game with things in it. You know, like actual gameplay variation where you're not just performing a single hyper simplistic action over and over again?



Advancedcaveman commented on Mutant Mudds Developer Muses on Wii U Design:

I personally don't think that changing the color of the Wii U would make a difference in this mass confusion situation. Calling it "Wii HD" or "Super Wii" wouldn't change the situation either.

Remember that retail map pack for Halo 2 that came out back in like 2004? I remember seing someone in a gamestop pick up the box, shout out loud (at the top of his lungs) that that it was Halo 3. The box said "Halo 2 Multiplayer Map Pack" in huge blue letters on the front. That's what people are like.



Advancedcaveman commented on Renegade Kid Worried About 3DS Piracy:

Well, Renegade Kid put their game on iOS where piracy is so bad it's forced developers to pull their games. You don't need any special parts or modifications to jailbreak a iOS device, and I'll often hear about games with 98% piracy rate.

A game called "Battle Dungeon" was recently pulled because the sheer amount of pirated copies was overwhelming the developers servers; so people can pirate iPhone games and still use the online functions.



Advancedcaveman commented on Talking Point: Test Running Rayman Legends:

I got really concerned when I tried this game in a store. For about 2 or 3 minutes it was great; just like Rayman Origins but with more vibrant graphics and a cool new character. But then it basically turned into an iphone game. The character starts autoscrolling and you're relegated to pecking at the touch screen and turning the controller to move platforms. I don't want this cellphone minigame BS; I want to play a platformer.



Advancedcaveman commented on Talking Point: Life Without Wii U Achievements:

@Cranky Achievements are bad because they're causing a decline in the use of cheats, easter eggs and other unlockable secret things that actually have an affect on gameplay (because allowing that stuff would make it easier to get achievements).

Achievements and gamerscore are completely meaningless; they're just little jpeg thumbnails and numbers that go on the main menu of your console. A lot of people get games just to get this crap, and its leading to the overall degeneration of gameplay mechanics. Everything is becoming more and more about addiction rather than engaging the player on any gameplay or storytelling level.

Because games are increasingly focusing on being "addictive" rather than engaging, you're getting more and more microtransactions and "freemium" games which are structured entirely around trying to get you to spend money (not buy things, just spend money) rather than being interesting to play in any way.



Advancedcaveman commented on Miyamoto: "Angry Birds Would Have Been Better ...:

I think he's saying this because he feels like he has to appeal to the internet hivemind. I got Angry Birds back in 2009 the day it came out. Within a week I kind of just forgot about it. About a year and a half later the whole world goes ape for it for no reason, and it all seems so fake.

I don't believe people actually like Angry Birds; people are just so addicted to constantly using the internet that they end up in a sort of collective hivemind where they just automatically like whatever the largest number of other people like.

I have independent thoughts, and that can screw up the whole angry birds fanaticism thing. I've played Worms so the basic artillery mechanic in angry birds feels like a very limited trial and error thing. I've played all kinds of adventure games and platformers with great characters so the newgrounds looking characters and art in angry birds just aren't special in any way.

But the borg collective of society has arbitrarily decided it likes angry birds, it so we keep going on like a broken record. Here's another public figure namedropping it in the hopes that people don't say mean things on twitter.



Advancedcaveman commented on The Thought of a Shooter-Only Future Makes Iwa...:

I am so sick of shooters. I played craploads of them from the late 90s to about the mid 2000s, and at this point everything I used to like about them has been bred out. They all have the same exact mechanics and settings at this point with absolutely no variation in gameplay, graphics, or theme.

Every single shooter released is a military themed, gritty realistic CoD or GoW clone that literally plays like an FMV game. Shooters are so linear and driven by context sensitive hand holding at this point that it seems like all the actual gameplay is completely gone. The levels are just hallways cluttered with chest high walls and exploding barrels, with a bunch of showy in engine cutscenes playing in the skybox outside the level. There are quick time events and context sensitive "stand here and press the use button to finish a mission object or traverse over this obstacle" spots.

There is no strategy or dynamism or choice at all anymore. Regenerating health is said to increase the strategy, but all it does is reduce all the strategy in the entire game to one solitary action you repeat over and over again: hide behind a wall while the game pushes the reset button. Theres no persistence or contrast in the way you survive. Ammo isn't even a gameplay element anymore because now games are starting to feature unlimited ammo regenerating crates every 5 feet.

Modern shooters really do just feel like FMV games at this point. You're basically just shooting at objects moving over a static background and performing random button prompts. The only real difference is the ugly full motion video has been replaced with ugly gritty-realistic polygonal graphics.



Advancedcaveman commented on Talking Point: Should Nintendo Have Made the 3...:

Nintendo can't make the 3DS download only because there are a lot of people who don't have internet access at home. A lot of them don't have it at all, some just can't afford a fast connection, some people don't have access to decent internet connections at all in their area. A lot of people also cannot afford smartphones and/or they don't have access to the right provider coverage. That lack of access does not exclude people from wanting to play games.

Get over it. The game buying populace of the world is not exclusive to LA and Tokyo. I'm amazed by the fact that game journalists don't seem to understand that. Go drive around small towns in the Midwest and then ask why the 3DS isn't download only.



Advancedcaveman commented on Reggie Defends High Download, Retail Price Point:

"Disposable" is the perfect descriptor for most iOS games. I've done the whole "replace your DS/PSP with an iPod touch" deal for little over a year now and I have to agree with the sentiment that a lot of these games are actually over-priced at 1 dollar. Probably at least 70% of iOS games are literally smaller than an Atari 2600 (not to dis that system). They're just tiny little games where you only have one input (EG: here's a game where all you do is touch little icons, here's a game where all you do is tilt to dodge things). There's also a lot of problems with hardware/software fragmentation; games get broken by firmware upgrades and more and more games now require latter iPod/iPhone models. Some games that crash after you upgrade the firmware never get patched, and some of them just get pulled and re-released as new apps that you'd have to purchase again. So games are disposable in a very literal sense because they can easily be rendered unusable by hardware and OS version transitions.

There's no level design, progression, or depth of any kind. That's not to say all iOS games are like that, but it seems like the majority of the most popular, highest selling games are. The true best iOS games tend to be forgotten; they under sale to the point that a few of them have been permanently pulled from the app store as the developers have gone bankrupt. 99 cent price points are a risk because the is always going to rise to the top. I think (at least I really hope) that more people will have a similar experience to me: after a few hundred iOS games over the course of about a year they go back to the DS/PSP, and realize how utterly empty the grand majority of their app store purchases really are. After going back to the DS the magic of the app store has really worn away and I've realized its kind of a money sink game platform, save for a certain set of really good indy games that most people ignore.

I bought Shantae: Risky's Revenge and realized this one 12 dollar game is worth more than countless hundreds of iPhone games put together. If Angry Birds is the all consuming future of portable gaming then I'm not playing portable games any more. I got that game when it first came out in December 09, and promptly lost interest because its nothing but a microcosm of the mechanics in Worms. Now people won't shut up about it, and I don't understand what everyone is smoking (well, actually I do; its the old follow the leader situation where people convince themselves something is good because it's popular). My purchase of Angry Birds is basically how the app store works; you keep buying game because they only cost a dollar and then when they start adding up you step back and realize they add up to a lot in cost but very little in terms of content. Unfortunately people don't even seem to care about quality anymore. They just consume anything readily available.



Advancedcaveman commented on Why the 3DS Will Not Use an Achievement System:

Achievements are little JPEG thumbnails; they are literally one of the most meaningless affects added to any medium ever created. I really can't fathom the level of psychosis that drives some people to pursue the act of trying to unlock achievements.

If you were unlocking cheat codes or secrets or other forms of tangible content that can actually affect the game then I could see the point. Achievements however are just little pictures accompanied by some on screen numbers. They don't do anything other than record the fact that you are playing a video game.

If you try to perform extremely difficult tasks in games to earn achievements, if you really really spend hours working at unlocking little JPEG images, I think you actually experiencing a clinical psychotic reaction.



Advancedcaveman commented on More Kid Icarus: Uprising Gameplay Videos:

This looks pretty neat but I would really rather play it on the Wii. Games where you have to juggle holding the device and holding the stylus to control the camera or an aiming reticule like this are a drag to play. Therein lies a ultimately a fundamental problem I have with the 3DS in general; I only really want to play simpler 2d games on handhelds.

Anything complicated and full 3d where you're dealing with camera control/aiming in edition to movement is better on a TV with a proper controller rather than being crammed onto a small slab shaped device with a tiny screen. Its just unerganomic and unnecessary.



Advancedcaveman commented on Rayman 3D Rated by ESRB:

I bet its another port of Rayman 2. That's fine; Rayman 2 is one of the greatest games ever made, but I wish they'd make a new one instead of all these Rabbids minigame collections. Make the damn 3d platformer Raving Rabbids was originally supposed to be...



Advancedcaveman commented on Warren Spector Defends Mickey's Maligned Camer...:

Mario Galaxy has extremely linear levels and a fixed camera. There are only a few places where you are running around an open field where you have any camera control. The game frequently goes into a side scrolling mode for that matter. My understanding is that Epic Mickey has you running through more of those open fields where you frequently have multiple routes and separate areas to go to rather than going through a linear course. If the game’s levels are going to have a lot of these hub like sections then it needs a floating camera. There really isn’t a familiar way to control a floating camera if you go with a Wii remote and nunchuck scheme because you don’t have a second analogue stick.

Mario Galaxy and Epic Mickey have fundamentally different methods of level design so it’s not really a fair comparison. Mario Galaxy didn’t “get the camera right,” the truth game is so linear that it doesn’t need camera control roughly 90% of the time, so the camera is a non issue. There isn’t really a camera system in Mario Galaxy at all, just a series of pre framed shots and rare occasions where you’re in a more open location and thus you have a pseudo floating camera. The majority of modern video games also aren't "getting the camera right" either; Most games nowadays are hyper linear. You're not going through designed levels; you're basically on a mine kart witnessing canned cinematics and pre planed gameplay activities where you're input is virtually meaningless. Therefore they can use pre scripted cameras.

They could have gone with the classic controller for Epic Mickey, but part of the point of the game is that it’s inherently satisfying to aim the Wii remote pointer around the screen and spray paint that way. It’s a more fun system than having to hold down a button and go into a stationary aiming mode like Mario Sunshine. You can either have a fixed camera game with linear levels and no camera control or a more open game with direct camera control, and compromises have to be made when you’re working with a controller that lacks certain input layers. I don’t know why they didn’t bother to put in a lock-on system or make better concessions about controlling the camera but that’s basically the deal. There’s going to be issues like this as long as these 2 piece motion controllers lack that second analogue layer, or they don’t provide any way to lock the pointer in the center of the screen and “turn it off” like when you lift a mouse up.

I wish Warren Specter would simply explain himself clearly like that instead of spewing out a stream of nonsensical vagaries like: “Oh we have a hard time with the camera because our game is a fusion of role playing adventure elements in which you make moral choice role playing choices in this decision making role playing adventure story hybrid game of adventure role playing adventure and the camera is different in role playing adventure hybrid adventure role playing.” Or,