This thread is for all things Pun, punny, or even so much pun they are lame.
Here is some things I came up with earlier,
I went down to Jamacia and bought some illegial DVDs. Now I'm a Pirate of the Carribean.
My music case is full of CDs. I was working on clarin-et out, but my Heavy Metal disc broke the shelf.
A riot was breaking loose at a restaurant. Ry the chef was not keeping up with the demand. When the manager walked in, he asked a man what was going on. He replied, "We Hung-ry!"

Oh no... >.>
Also, hanging the guy won't help them get their food.

I walked in my room late at night and found,

and it ended with a lot of pun-ching u_u
_{I'm sure theres a pun in there somewhere >:3}

@Emmy I'm sorry I've been meaning to tell you this:
I saw @Jump and @SMEXI in a hotel Foyer yesterday. They were boasting about their intellectual skills because of their recent chess victories.
I would have said hi, but I had to leave. I can't stand Open Chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer. u-u

My butt talks a load of crap.

after watching a Coca Cola ad on TV
Well, that's what I'd like to call a coke-mercial!

@NinFreak - crickets chirping

Rev up those fryers, cause i'm sure hungry for some.......help, help, MY LEG!!!!!

(This is a pun for me at least)

I wanted to build trains, but then I got sidetracked.

I don't do requests :3

I wanted to get money from a bug. So I got money from a CENT-ipede.

I got told i don't have a stomach. I was gutted!

There was once a wasp, who lived in a wasp hive. Every day, he and his parents and multitude other wasp friends helped to build the hive, but eventually he got bored. This wasp decided to go into politics. He went to wasp university and studied for hours and hours, eventually getting a certificate and graduating. After a gruelling campaign, he finally became mayor of the wasp hive. Upon reflection, however, it was a pretty little wasp hive, so he packed his bags and flew off. After wandering the streets for days, he eventually found the town hall and wandered inside, handing over his papers. Suddenly, the mayor died of a heart attack and this little wasp was cleared mayor. He was a pretty good mayor, improving education and public transport and other stuff like that. But soon he tired of his little township, and sent a letter to the honourable Premier of the state (we hav those in AU, not sure about anywhere else) who decided to hand over his post to this up-and-coming little wasp. Again, the wasp performed admirably, with the capital being relocated to this now-prosperous state. But soon, the wasp tired of even this and sent a letter to his next-door neighbour, the prime minister. She was glad to move out of the New Lodge, as the wasp kept having wild parties that kept her awake at night. The wasp assumed ultimate control of the country, waging war on a couple of others and expanding its borders. But soon, he realised why he kept tiring of his political positions: he missed his hive. Solemnly, and with no warning, he resigned one day and flee back to his family hive. It was a joyous reunion, with many new brothers that this wasp had never heard of. But then he decided he was thirsty, so he strolled down to the local pub. Unfortunately, the queue for a drink was enormous, and he decided to go somewhere else. He strolled next door to the coffe shop, but their queue was enormous. He suddenly remembered a little-known stand that sold fruit punch. After navigating a maze of alleys, he finally located it and lo and behold:

There's no punch-line!

Wanna hear a bomb on an airplane joke? They will blow you away. Never mind, airplane jokes are plane wrong.

@Mudjo That was a long read. I was hoping there would bee a better punch-line. Too bad that it wasp a lame one.

What did the boy banana say to the girl banana. She was a ppealing

Making handicap jokes are LAME.

What did one outlet say to the crude one?
"Your manners are quite SHOCKING."

That's all I have.

Can't think of anything good, so I'll post this instead.

You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish. Unless of course, you play bass.