I figured it was high time someone made this thread. This thread is a place for jokes, or one liners, or funny stories, etc. A few rules that we should follow if possible:
don't make them vulgar
try not to specifically insult any religion, race, etc. Blond jokes aren't really insulting, and I doubt anyone minds those. Other than that, let's see how many laughs we can get out of this! I''ll start one, which [according the the encyclopedia of immaturity] is the only funny math joke ever told. There are 3 types of people in this world, those that count, and those that can't.
Just let it happen.
3DS Friend Code: 5026-4947-0924 | Nintendo Network ID: Percentful
One morning, a mama cow and her three baby cows were out grazing in the field. The first baby cow comes up to the mama cow and says, "Mama, why is my name Daisy?"
And the mama cow said, "Well sweetie, when you were born, a daisy fell on your head."
And the first baby cow trotted off, satisfied.
The next day, they were all out in the field again. The second baby cow came up to the mama cow and said, "Mama, why is my name Tulip?"
"Well, honey, when you were born a tulip fell on your head."
And the baby cow was happy with that answer and continued grazing.
The next day, they all went out into the field again to graze. The third baby cow came up to the mama cow and said, "GLUPHABABABLUGHARDTHYPOGHHH!!!"
There were 3 baby cows, and a mama cow. The first baby cow said - "Mom, que is my name Daisy?" "Because a Daisy fell on your head when you were born" Then the second baby cow said - "Why is my name Tulip?" "Because, a Tulip fell on your head when you were born." The Mama cow replied. Finally the Third baby cow said - "oleipsanodrimpklfovds" == "SHUT UP BRICK!!!!" ==
That's really good!
Just let it happen.
3DS Friend Code: 5026-4947-0924 | Nintendo Network ID: Percentful
On day, a blonde went shopping at Best Buy. She found a TV she wanted, so she called an employee over and said "Id like to buy this TV." But the employee said, "No, because your a blonde." So the blonde went home, and she dyed her hair red. She went back to the Best Buy and said to the same employee "Now can I have that TV?" But the employee said "No, because your a blonde." The blonde said "How did you know that Im a blonde?" and the employee said "Because thats not a TV, thats a microwave."
A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence: he's allowed to say two words every seven years. After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words. "Cold floors," he says. They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him back in and ask for his two words. He clears his throats and says, "Bad food." They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him in for his two words. "I quit," he says. "That's not surprising," the elders say. "You've done nothing but complain since you got here.
"The government of the United States is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion."
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Topic: The Funny Thread
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