I don't really care about Tingle. A 35 year old man pretending to be a fairy is a comic relief character,and THAT's it. But his maps are HELPFUL though.

Yeah, his maps are more helpful than the Triforce! This logic is based on the fact that you use his maps all through the game, but you only use the Triforce at the end of a Zelda game, if you can call it "using" it at all. By this line of reasoning, Termina is better than Hyrule because it has a character more useful than the Triforce in it.

You think I was joking...
And you're only saying that because you weren't invited. Maybe we didn't WANT to invite you. Huh? WHATCHA GONNA DO 'BOUT IT?! HUH?!

Get under the covers and sob.

Iwata showed up drunk at the house last night. He let it slip that Nintendo's big E3 surprise is Art Style: Blaaahhrrrggghhh, a minimalistic puzzle game that involves manipulating globs of puke as they flow out of a drunken Japanese guy's mouth and drift slowly to the ground. You need to match them by color, shape and odor.

At least, that's what I assume he was trying to tell me by vomiting so rudely in my rose bushes.

The poor man. I think he's just under so much pressure from everyone anticipating a good E3 this year, even though last years was a shambles. I think I'm gonna have to cancel that truck load of eggs I was gonna sell to people outside the hall so that they could lob them at the stage when they spend half an hour talking about Wii Sports Resort. Sigh
If anyone sees him on the street, be sure to give him a hot drink and some spare clothes.

I'm holding Reggie hostage until he cancels releasing Mario & Link:Partners In Mahattan. He claims he thought the game was hardcore. So,I decided to make him play Metroid Prime 2:Echoes until E3 to make him remember what hardcore means.

@Wiiloveit: Funny to hear you say that, given that your avatar is a screenshot from...hmm...Wii Sports Resort? I smell a hypocrite, and he smells FUNKY! Don't ask how I can smell you through the web. If I told you, I'd have to kill you.

Iwata stopped by the house yesterday. I invited him over for some delicious roasted penguin and chicken alfredo. After we indulged in that, we played the beta version of It's my Birthday. He was laughing with joy and I just gave him an evil look. I kicked him in the stomach and he threw up the penguin and chicken. I just said "Poor Chicken Brutus and CowLaunch."

@Stuffgamer: The waterskiing game looks awesome to be fair, but they did go on for a while about WSR, which is really odd since the game STILL isn't out. And, my avatar looks snazzy

Wave Race with Miis? How could it look anything but awesome? I hope you can ride dolphins again.

We're getting besides the point here. Remember, that this thread is dedicated to that atheist, Iwata.

More news:

Depending upon the region, Art Style: Blaaahhrrrggghhh will be renamed Art Style: Blaaahhrrrggghuia, Art Style: Blaaahhrrrgggite or Art Style: Blaaahhrrrggquario.

Miyamoto just called, said he wanted my input on some kind of new peripheral for just that. So I flew out to NoJ's R&D place, and it turns out they actually built a freaking dolphin. It weighs 600 lbs, swims around (within a 30-foot radius of the Wii, at least), and runs on fish (as well as batteries for the wiimote you shove into its blowhole), but the bad part is that you need to set up your Wii on a pier or the beach in order to use it (well, that, and it also smells like fish D: ).

After testing it out for a while, we got bored with the connection to the Wii constantly cutting out, so we went fishing instead, but i hate fishing so we went and got some Indian chow. I'm afraid I had to tell him it would be a flop on the market. He thanked me, autographed my t-shirt, and then I flew home.

I know what Miyamoto is trying to tell you! They are telling you that Sega is making an Ecoo the Dolphin video game where all he does is eat Indian Chow! The game is called Ecco & Indian Chow!!,and it will be on WiiWare this Monday.

well, they seem to prefer their peripherals be usable for multiple games, so that makes sense...

I wrote something about Legend of Zelda: Croquet like 70 posts ago...and reading 141 forward....yeah who even knows where we are now.

Can't believe no one's mentioned Tingle's Time-Traveling Baseball 2K9...the side-scrolling mechanics are so sound, and the Wii-Speak support is incredibly fluid! Pre-orders come with a felt purse filled with buttons!

Iwata stopped by the house yesterday. He said we're going to SuperCon in Miami this weekend. Me, him and Cammie are going to dress up as Pikmin and stir up some interest in the third game.

I asked if he could show me any footage of the new game and he said no, but he did give me one hint: Pikmin genitals.

That's all he was able to say. I'll report back from SuperCon. If you're there, say hello and get our autographs!

Miyamoto and me are going to SuperCon too!
We are going to dress up as bulborbs and eat some Pikmin you-know-what.

Iwata stopped by the house yesterday. He said he's getting a lot of ideas for the Club Nintendo exclusive gift from the Nintendo Vending Machine thread.

Let the speculation begin!

Also, he said Bit.Trip: Beat was too hard and needed to be broken into smaller songs. So I dug out my old Game Cube controllers and smacked the crap out of him.