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Topic: I'm bored.Tell me a joke please.

Posts 1 to 20 of 53

OldBoy

Anyone got any good ones.It's Monday and I'm bored. Here's one for you guys.

Look I was raised a catholic and when I was a little boy the thing i didn't like about church was all the
sitting down,standing up,kneeling
sitting down,standing up,kneeling
sitting down,standing up,kneeling

I just wished the preist would've picked a postion and f*****d me!!!!!!!!!!

I did post this is the religious views thread but i think thats died although Chicken B + Cowlaunch seemed to like it.

Edited on by OldBoy

What's this bit for again?

Dezner

Bad Joke # 34685:

Q: What's black and white with red all over?
A: A zebra with diaper rash!
Eyepatch guy from Harvey Birdman: "Ha! HA!"

o_O

Wii: 6882-4334-4721-0727 --- PSN: OrangeGouf --- XBL: Orange Gouf

Uguu!

Twitter:

JohnnyB

At the age of six I was left an orphan. What kind of idiot gives an orphan to a six year-old?

"If I were you, I'd dance naked in the middle of the street just to embarrass you."

JohnnyB

First thing this morning, there was a tap on my door. Funny sense of humour my plumber has... _

"If I were you, I'd dance naked in the middle of the street just to embarrass you."

Chrono_Cross

JohnnyB wrote:

At the age of six I was left an orphan. What kind of idiot gives an orphan to a six year-old?

...I don`t get it?

Just for you.
"I'm just a musical prostitute, my dear." - Freddie Mercury

Dezner

xD

If she's old enough to be seven, she's old enough to be eight!

slaps knee

Wii: 6882-4334-4721-0727 --- PSN: OrangeGouf --- XBL: Orange Gouf

Uguu!

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Cryptonic

.....(doesnt laugh)....

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"Tiger Man was wise"

Old_School

Just remember to relax everyone, it's only life, none of us make it out alive!

Vegeta: Just...just...transform damn you...
Bulma: We are going to have a penthouse sweet...and he'll drive a corvet...and we will make love every single...
Zarbon: (transforms)
Bulma: KILL IT WITH FIRE!

pixelman

JohnnyB wrote:

At the age of six I was left an orphan. What kind of idiot gives an orphan to a six year-old?

LOL nice one.

And I hope everyone realizes this thread is just for that jokes competition nintendolife is holding.

pixelman

Nintendo Network ID: pixelpowa

Modern_Legend

JohnnyB wrote:

First thing this morning, there was a tap on my door. Funny sense of humour my plumber has... _

Don't see how no one realizes this is the funniest joke here lol very nicely done

PSN ID: MixedMajik
Wii Number - 5995 0961 9020 5722 SSBB - 1504 5385 8344 Mario Kart Wii - 5327 1326 6518 Bomberman Blast 5370 8314 4869 Water Warfare 5327 9207 9563 http://www.nintendolife.com/chat

theblackdragon

Chrono+Cross wrote:

JohnnyB wrote:

At the age of six I was left an orphan. What kind of idiot gives an orphan to a six year-old?

...I don`t get it?

'i was left an orphan' can be read two ways:
(a) his parents died (and he was left an orphan)
(b) someone literally left him an orphan (out on his doorstep, perhaps)

BEST THREAD EVER
future of NL >:3
[16:43] James: I should learn these site rules more clearly
[16:44] LztheBlehBird: James doesn't know the rules? For shame!!!
[16:44] Vintage: We have rules?
[16:44] Reala: don't expose the staff to sunlight, don't get them wet and don't feed them after midnight

Nintendo Network ID: gentlemen_cat | Twitter:

Modern_Legend

@theblackdragon once again you've come to the rescue

PSN ID: MixedMajik
Wii Number - 5995 0961 9020 5722 SSBB - 1504 5385 8344 Mario Kart Wii - 5327 1326 6518 Bomberman Blast 5370 8314 4869 Water Warfare 5327 9207 9563 http://www.nintendolife.com/chat

theblackdragon

@DaDun: i thought that joke was pretty funny myself :3

BEST THREAD EVER
future of NL >:3
[16:43] James: I should learn these site rules more clearly
[16:44] LztheBlehBird: James doesn't know the rules? For shame!!!
[16:44] Vintage: We have rules?
[16:44] Reala: don't expose the staff to sunlight, don't get them wet and don't feed them after midnight

Nintendo Network ID: gentlemen_cat | Twitter:

AnneMarie

Dezner wrote:

Bad Joke # 34685:

Q: What's black and white with red all over?
A: A zebra with diaper rash!
Eyepatch guy from Harvey Birdman: "Ha! HA!"

o_O

"Eyepatch Guy's" Name Is Phil Ken Sebben btw.... "Ha Ha cookies on dowels"

http://www.facebook.com/annemarie.harms?ref=profile Feel free to add me if you want!!
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wanderlustwarrior

JohnnyB: those are some pretty good ones

In line with the site, I present some knock knock jokes. (though you'd have to be in person to do it well)

Knock Knock

Who's There?

Interrupting Cow

Interrupti

MOOOOOO!

Knock Knock

Who's There?

Interrupting sheep

Interrup

BAAAAA!

Knock Knock

Who's There?

Interrupting falcon

Interrupting falcon...

PAWNCH!!!!! (and then you punch (or otherwise hit) whoever you're telling the joke to)

I use the same username on TVTropes and youtube. look me up!

My virginity is one thing, but I can't let the pedophiles have my Wii FriendCode®

wanderlustwarrior

RIP, George Carlin

I use the same username on TVTropes and youtube. look me up!

My virginity is one thing, but I can't let the pedophiles have my Wii FriendCode®

Kim_Jong-Il

wanderlustwarrior wrote:

RIP, George Carlin

"Pass the boob please."
But anyway, I know a great one.
A girl walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre. So the bartender gives it to her.

Kim_Jong-Il

malpon

how many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? It depends if it's on or not.
Whats the diference between a brunette and the garbage? at least the garbage gets taken out once a week.
Why is it better to date an anerexic then a belemic? With A belemic you still have to buy the meal.

This lesbian bar doesent have a fire exit!

Tails

(Mine will be cute.) A Guy named Barney Buildrick is a school bus driver & he drives a special bus there are sesame street characters on it. (ex. Bert & Ernie Elmo Big Bird.) On his first stop he picks up these twin girls there both Fat & named Pattie (they get on the bus.) 2nd stop he comes up to this kid named Ross he says "Hi I'm Ross & I'm Special." (he gets on) 3rd stop he picks up A Kid named Lester he says "Hi I'm lester I'm special." (& he gets on) So as Barney drives them to school he looks in the mirror seeing lester with his shoes & socks off. Barney asks "What are you doing?" Lester says "I'm looking for bunyons." So he takes them to school takes them home comes home & his wife asks him how his day was He says "Well I Had Two Large Patties Special Ross Lester Picking Bunyons on A Sesame Street Bus." XD!!!!

Check out Wii-kly Review's on http://www.videogameheat.com PSN ID: TailsPrower86 3DS FC: 3695 0027 1349 Tails XBL GamerTag: BioReaver86

Kim_Jong-Il

Tails86 wrote:

(Mine will be cute.) A Guy named Barney Buildrick is a school bus driver & he drives a special bus there are sesame street characters on it. (ex. Bert & Ernie Elmo Big Bird.) On his first stop he picks up these twin girls there both Fat & named Pattie (they get on the bus.) 2nd stop he comes up to this kid named Ross he says "Hi I'm Ross & I'm Special." (he gets on) 3rd stop he picks up A Kid named Lester he says "Hi I'm lester I'm special." (& he gets on) So as Barney drives them to school he looks in the mirror seeing lester with his shoes & socks off. Barney asks "What are you doing?" Lester says "I'm looking for bunyons." So he takes them to school takes them home comes home & his wife asks him how his day was He says "Well I Had Two Large Patties Special Ross Lester Picking Bunyons on A Sesame Street Bus." XD!!!!

Lol wut?
Nice avatar BTW OP.

Edited on by Kim_Jong-Il

Kim_Jong-Il

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