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Topic: Free-Range Jokes, Straight from the Minds of Funny NLers

Posts 41 to 60 of 83

GamerZack87

@PunnyGuy: Thanks for the compliment! By the way, ROFL

"Pay me 20 Rupees and I'll talk."
CHINK
"Never forget the comfort of freshly-washed shorts."

GamerZack87

Q. What do you get if you cross a plumber with his favourite dish?
A. You get Spaghetti Mario-nara!

And now for one that doesn't stink...

Mario, Peach and Wario are crossing the desert when Wario comes across something shiny. "Wa-ha-ha-ha! I found a shiny thing!" he says. He brushes some sand off of it to make it gleam, when POOF a genie appears! "I am the great Kalimari, most powerful Koopa Genie!" says the genie, "you have three wishes!" "Three wishes EACH?" says Wario greedily. "No," says the genie, "three wishes between you!" He turns to Peach, and says, "fair princess, you may have the first wish!" "Oh," says Peach. "What you must do," continues the genie, "is climb that waterslide and call out your wish as you descend. Once you land in the pool, your wish will come true!" Peach changes into her swimsuit, climbs the slide, and thinks. She starts to slide, and calls out, "I wish I had a P-Wing to give to my friend Mario!" Peach lands in the pool, and sure enough, there is a bubble containing a P-Wing floating on the surface. The genie turns to Mario, and says, "noble hero of this land, you may have the second wish!" Mario climbs the slide, and thinks. He starts to slide, and calls out, "I wish I had a 3-Up Moon to give to my friend Peach!" Mario lands in the pool, and sure enough, there is a 3-Up Moon hanging in the air beside the pool. Peach and Mario both climb out of the pool, and the genie turns to Wario, saying, "Uh...er...you there! You may have the third and final wish!" Wario pays no attention to the genie, climbing straight up the slide! "This looks like fun!" he says, and without thinking, he slides down, yelling out, "WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!"

Edited on by GamerZack87

"Pay me 20 Rupees and I'll talk."
CHINK
"Never forget the comfort of freshly-washed shorts."

StarBoy91

I think I've got one (I hope) [play on words]:

Long ago, a young martial artist in Japan was in dire need of more training, because he was hoping of entering the tournament. He asked high and low where he could find some help, until someone pointed out to the stadium where two masters were standing. "Who are they?", asked the young martial artist. Said someone replied, "They are Shori Uken and Haad Oken."

Edited on by StarBoy91

To each their own

Punny

What did Ninten say to himself when he was all alone?

"I want my Mother."

I'm back (for the moment)!

GamerZack87

@SpaghettiToastDinner: I'd rather hear your joke about spaghetti.
It's ballsy, that one!

@PunnyGuy:

Edited on by GamerZack87

"Pay me 20 Rupees and I'll talk."
CHINK
"Never forget the comfort of freshly-washed shorts."

StarBoy91

So, how was my joke?

To each their own

GamerZack87

@StarBoy91: I actually get that! Funny, or should I say 'Punny'! Hey PunnyGuy, you have competition!

A self-loving balloon says to a sad horse, "Why the long face?"
The horse says to the balloon, "I don't know, why the inflated ego?"

Edited on by GamerZack87

"Pay me 20 Rupees and I'll talk."
CHINK
"Never forget the comfort of freshly-washed shorts."

Punny

A traveler was visiting Italy. While she was walking around, she noticed an Italian man on the road urinating. The traveler walked up to the man and said, "You're-a peein!"

@StarBoy91: Very funny! Very punny, too!

Edited on by Punny

I'm back (for the moment)!

Aviator

@Punny Eeew Hobart.

QUEEN OF SASS

It's like, I just love a cowboy
You know
I'm just like, I just, I know, it's bad
But I'm just like
Can I just like, hang off the back of your horse
And can you go a little faster?!

Xkhaoz

A joke only usable is something died: "Everything dies eventually. It's the circle of life. Though it's usually the oval of life because all the parts of it don't sit in the right places."

http://steamcommunity.com/id/xkhaoz

Punny

A guy walks into a sea food stand and asks what everybody is selling. The fish salesman says, "I've got fish!" The lobster salesman says, "I've got lobsters!" The clam salesman says, "I've got clams!" The shrimp salesman says, "I've got shrimp!" The crab salesman just points to his sign that says "CRABS."

I'm back (for the moment)!

pikku

lol Punnyguy

pikku

3DS Friend Code: 1891-1165-2008 | Nintendo Network ID: pikmaniac

Moco_Loco

What do you get when you combine an elephant and a rhino?
Elephino.

Can you telephone from a submarine?
Of course I can tell a phone from a submarine, can't you?

Moco Loco
If you find yourself spiritually drifting (as I was for far too many years), remember that Jesus can and will walk across the water to reach you and bring you back to shore.

StarBoy91

Moco+Loco wrote:

Can you telephone from a submarine?
Of course I can tell a phone from a submarine, can't you?

That's good.


Thanks, NintendoPurist and Yakko.

Edited on by StarBoy91

To each their own

SwerdMurd

X-box 360.

-Swerd Murd

(check my tunes out at www.soundcloud.com/swerdmurd)

Punny

Swerd_Murd wrote:

X-box 360.

You crack me up, Swerd_Murd!

I'm back (for the moment)!

Wizzy

The Queen has a Scepter, instead of a staff because everyone in the castle works, cept her!

Wizzy

StarBoy91

One day, a young Luma had decided to share a joke he had come up with to a Shy Guy.
Luma: "Knock, knock!"
Shy Guy: "Who's there?"
Luma: "Yah."
Shy Guy: "Yah who?"
Luma: "Is that your favorite search engine?"


Not as good as my first joke, probably, but it just came to me, and it's not bad (I think).
Thoughts on my joke? What did you think of it?

Edited on by StarBoy91

To each their own

GamerZack87

StarBoy91 wrote:

One day, a young Luma had decided to share a joke he had come up with to a Shy Guy.
Luma: "Knock, knock!"
Shy Guy: "Who's there?"
Luma: "Yah."
Shy Guy: "Yah who?"
Luma: "Is that your favorite search engine?"


Not as good as my first joke, probably, but it just came to me, and it's not bad (I think).
Thoughts on my joke? What did you think of it?

LOL
That is funny, StarBoy91! Keep up the good work! Maybe some more Luma-related jokes will brighten up this space!

_________________________________________________________________________________________

A sultan's wife walks up to a sad-looking prune and asks, "Why so glum?" The prune says, "Well, people keep mispronouncing the word 'plum'." "I know what you mean," says the sultan's wife, "people keep mistaking me for a dried grape."

Edited on by GamerZack87

"Pay me 20 Rupees and I'll talk."
CHINK
"Never forget the comfort of freshly-washed shorts."

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